Hold on Tight

They say you gotta own it now
Staring back at the fact
But a big bag of anxiety is strapped to my back
It's how I'm going down
So much weight that it takes a million days
Full of aches pains and J's
And I've been amazed, blazed deep into meditation
Elimination of the self with self-help and then I'm waking
It was all a dream, as usual, I'm feeling unusual
I move through my day YouTube to a rude juvenile
I'm not cool you know
My inner voices a collection of the disturbed
A "who's who" of the gurus who have confused you all
Now when I'm taking a walk in the park, I feel scared
Not for myself, but of myself
And for that, I wasn't prepared

I hold on tight... to my mistakes
So I fall on down... and fade away
To release my hands... is all it takes
No more reasons why... I can but hate

Why do I hate? Why do I think of myself as better than great?
My living of late, I've spent every day, giving the venom a taste
It's been inate, my lack of serotonin, owning my brain
Vain but in pain, when offered umbrellas
I remained in the rain
Drained and insane, from playing the game, I go on a visit with Jane
Now it's all plane, flying with wings up in the sky with no aims
Not feeling chains, or weighed down by what I should've contained
If I could've been a little different
But instead I've chosen to just be insane
So take it all back
Back to the house
We won't be needing it anymore
So pack it up in a box with a mouse
I've all but signed out, I'm gone

I hold on tight... to my mistakes
So I fall on down... and fade away
To release my hands... is all it takes
No more reasons why... I can but hate

I can't hate you... I tried
But I can't hate you
I can't hate you... I tried
But I can't hate you... inside

I hold on tight... to my mistakes
So I fall on down... and fade away
To release my hands... is all it takes
No more reasons why... I can but hate
I hold on tight... to my mistakes alright
I fall on down and fade away
No more reasons why... I can but hate