Not the Same

I just wanted to make this track

For all the people that get told
How they should feel
When they got a lotta shit
That they can't show

This for y'all

I'll admit that I don't talk a lot
Got some hidden battles, taught myself to walk it out
I'm just livin' in a world where they crop you out
So I keep to myself, and ask God about
All my pain, and my lessons
And why I'm always stressin'
I dwell on the past, reminisce on redirections
Wish I could go back, would inform through reflection
Should've took my time, when I birthed those conceptions
And I don't understand, how I'm supposed be a man
With a life so grand
In a ostracized country, ruled by Uncle Sam
Only 20 years old but I feel so damned
Wanna go away for good, nah don't say that man
Cause you gotta keep that promise, stay up for the fam
My soul stay hurtin', like a finger jammed
Voice won't tell you, swear that my eyes can
Sometimes I even struggled to say I can
Gave out mad love, got no replies then
Stabbed me in my back, now I got 5 friends
Heart turned cold, no more cryin'
They say you evolve, yeah I'm dyin'
Man I don't care no more, yeah I'm tryin'
Used to ask for help, could never find it
When you tell em' how you feel
They say you whinin'

I just look up in the sky
So many questions
While I hurt
Waiting for replies
I wanna give up
See their dreams
So I try
Know I lost myself
Who I never could find

I just look up in the sky
So many questions
While I hurt
Waiting for replies
I wanna give up
See their dreams
So I try
Know I lost myself
Who I never could find

Keep going for the ones I love
Can't let em' down
Grinding for the ones above
Lost a few good people
Real ones that loved
Me for myself
When I talked, never judged
Now they gone, man I just feel unplugged
Now I really understand why some deal with drugs
When I was little, man I really needed hugs
If I'm being honest, I just needed love
Could've went out on the streets, to be a thug
Or ran away from home to what was
Out in the world, where they beat us up
Heart turn real cold, you can't heat it up
Livin' in my head
Thoughts keeping up
Memories of the past hurt
But it's the sweetest stuff

Man

It's the sweetest stuff

I just look up in the sky
So many questions
While I hurt
Waiting for replies
I wanna give up
See their dreams
So I try
Know I lost myself
Who I never could find

I just look up in the sky
So many questions
While I hurt
Waiting for replies
I wanna give up
See their dreams
So I try
Know I lost myself
Who I never could find

Man

I cherish people's eyes
Like these women cherish wedding rings
Occasionally I'll get a glance
That's when they tell me many things
The pain, the suffering
So many things unsettling
The dim sparkles, from the dreams

Once of those better things