Emotionally Dumb

I'm emotionally dumb
I hop on every song bearin' soul, spilling guts
'Cause this the only place that I don't feel like I be judged
If I tell you how I'm feelin' over samples and drums
Boy, I fuck up everyday hurtin' people that I love
'Cause I can't communicate, it's the way that I came up
I internalize the bad and it's hard for me to trust
I got narcissistic qualities, I hear I'm out of touch

But I'm hella sensitive, I feel it if I'm pennin' it
If I put it out, I only did it for your benefit
I really stay alone to protect you from myself
Used to hide behind the drugs, now I hide behind my wealth
I said "Later" to my heart just to focus on the bread
'Cause my baby needed food, clothes, linen on his bed
Woman from my past told me that I'm turnin' cold and it's sad
I used to make her feel like she was home, bring him back

But it's hard though, I was young and dumber with my guard low
Now I'm numb, sendin' big money through wells fargo
Y'all the only ones that get the best of me, though
My higher self is on the track and the rest of me low
But I'm workin' on it, no more escapin' when I'm hurtin'
No more self-sabotage, livin' against my purpose
More appreciation for myself when I ain't perfect
Every day I get up and grow, that's what I chose