Broken Wheels

I can't seem to get up out my mind, ay
I just wanna know if I'll be fine, ay
Dealing with my stress like all the time, ay
Happiness has been so hard to find, ay

Look,I don't even have to lie to you
I'm talking to you bout my real pain
Thoughts that's going on inside my head
Makes it hard for me to ever feel safe
Family tried to tell me go to school
I tried to tell em this the real thang
They don't know about the drive I got
So I'm boutta do this til the wheels break
This the start like a car jump
Hating on me but its part-love
I hate myself too that's the reason
That every record gets barred up
Ain't nobody else could match my talent
That's a fact, and that's a challenge
Other rappers coming after me would be
Like them coming after Jimmy "Rabbit"
Think about it, yeah, understand that I'm well-read
I payed attention to the great legends so
I don't wanna try to sell death
This is how I'm living every day
Where it's feeling like I just can't escape
Mental illness is a issue with me
I don't care If you can or can't relate
I'm sorry, look I just have to be honest with me
I don't want to have to sugarcoat it when
My therapist is here talking with me
I don't want to have to lie to you and say
I'm happy when it's just awful with me
Every time I lay down to sleep
Take a coffin with me, yeah

I can't seem to get up out my mind, ay
I just wanna know if I'll be fine, ay
Dealing with my stress like all the time, ay
Happiness has been so hard to find, ay

I just talked to my real dad
For the first time in like 10 years
But he don't know about the pain I felt when
He talked to me and he shed tears
I'd do anything to have him back
And at the start it felt weird
But the prison system took his life away
So things for him never felt clear
Nowadays he's drug free
He told me that he ain't bout that
I don't get how he felt stuck
And still dipped out the mouse trap
I'll be honest with the fuckin world,
I don't know how he bounced back
But that's the shit that's inside of me
So watch me put it on this soundtrack
Half my life is a horror movie
But the other half is a state of bliss
I don't know how I navigate it
But I treat this shit like it's dangerous
Now the world is weighing down on me
Feel that shit when I take a piss
My brother passed away at 26
He left a kid shit makes me sick, fuck
Yeah, I live with pain and it stays with me
But I don't care about saving me
That's why I deal with complacency
I just wanna get through a day without
Someone saying that they pray for me
I just wanna do a homicide on the pain in me, please

I can't seem to get up out my mind, ay
I just wanna know if I'll be fine, ay
Dealing with my stress like all the time, ay
Happiness has been so hard to find, ay