Bitter Poetry

I think I have it at the right volume
Alright lets go

I don't wanna' just rap, I wanna' make music
I smoke a lot of weed, but I ain't stupid
If I don't have THC, then my brain loosens
Get way confused and, kind of go insane and lose it

Is this weirdness just me maturing from evil urges
Cause I choose not to be converted to cheesy churches
None that shit makes sense to me, your need to worship
This rap shit is a game to see who can reach the furthest

I seize a purpose but I struggle cause I can't find it
Last year, had a couple members from my fam die I'm
Feeling guilty, I would never visit cause my hands tied and
I be forgetting how fucking precious all my damn time is

Had a bad mindset
All that savage rhyming
When I'm rapping grimy
Might come back to bight me
That's for acting hyphy
Just want my fans to like me
On my path to shining
Don't care about the timing

I just want to take it slow
We gone make it home and even if it taking long
I ain't caring where we go, on lot of things I may be wrong
Writing all these bitter songs but I learned how to take a loss
I guess that you could say I'm lost

I'd like to tell myself it's all up from here
Hopefully we don't get the belt from another year
Without my father was protective when my brother scared
Always checking below the bed to see what's under there

Yeah, got nothing to be afraid of
Love is the thing that change us
Niggas strung up being a hater
'Tryna bust at MCs who came up
That fuckery is contagious
This life is a crazy bitch
While I some degree entertain her

I just want to make the most from this
Rest in piece to the ones who had to go from us
Still 'tryna find sleez I been ghost hunting
Every drop kept going when I sold nothing
The smartest ones really know nothing
Felt like god since my soul summoned
No improv, this my whole front end
Write these songs and I don't rush it

I just want to take it slow
We gone make it home and even if it taking long
I ain't caring where we go, on lot of things I may be wrong
Writing all these bitter songs but I learned how to take a loss
I guess that you could say I'm lost