Quaran-Tina
My friends made a bet with me
I lost and suddenly
I'm on eHarmony
They made an account for me
The perfect girl to seek
None were good enough for me, yet
Then I found her, she was twenty-three
She was a ballerina
She lived in Argentina
She went by the name Christina
Was a beauty queen
Her profile was squeaky clean, yeah
Christina
I can't wait to meet ya
Christina
One day I swear I'm gonna see ya
She wanted to fly out to see me
Couldn't wait to meet me
I sent her cash to pay the fee, yeah
She would need a little more dinero
Had some more to spare-o
We're planning out our lives to share, oh
Her picture looks just like Beyoncé
Finally a girl who wants me
My more than 90-day fiancée
We could make the perfect team
My South American dream
Couldn't be a catfish scheme, oh no
Christina
I just can't wait to meet ya
Christina
Book the flight so I can see ya
I sent her mucho mucho money
It was for my honey
Did I mention she's a Playboy bunny?
My friends, they did not believe me
Said the situation's creepy
But finally she came to see me
Picked her up she looked a little older
Wider than her picture sold her
But beauty's eye is the beholder
Got her just before the travel ban hit
The timing's perfect
We're quarantined in my apartment
Quaran-Tina
I really couldn't wait to see ya
Quaran-Tina
Now there's all this time for you and me, ah
She has a belt with a lock and key
Practices chastity
Saving herself just for me, I know
Says she doesn't want a prenup
Cause our love was built on real trust
She says "Baby, isn't that enough?" oh-oh
Says she won't be like other wives
She collects hunting knives
And she doesn't value life, much
Said she had a surprise for us
She picked up the coronavirus
So we can share that bond between us
Quaran-Tina
I wish there was a way to leave ya
Quaran-Tina
I'm living out my days in fear, oh no
Played a game of Monopoly
We had a disagreement
She tried to claim that I was cheating
Then she threatened to give me a beating
Leave me in the bedroom bleeding
Maybe she is not the one for me, no no
This relationship is killing me
When I say killing me
She might kill me literally, oh no
Said she was going out for groceries
She went on a killing spree
Kinda glad it wasn't me though
Quaran-Tina
I thought that this would be a dream
Quran-Tina
But it turned into a nightmare scene
Quaran-Tina
Some things aren't always what they seem
Quran-Tina
I blame my friends and eHarmony, oh yeah
I lost and suddenly
I'm on eHarmony
They made an account for me
The perfect girl to seek
None were good enough for me, yet
Then I found her, she was twenty-three
She was a ballerina
She lived in Argentina
She went by the name Christina
Was a beauty queen
Her profile was squeaky clean, yeah
Christina
I can't wait to meet ya
Christina
One day I swear I'm gonna see ya
She wanted to fly out to see me
Couldn't wait to meet me
I sent her cash to pay the fee, yeah
She would need a little more dinero
Had some more to spare-o
We're planning out our lives to share, oh
Her picture looks just like Beyoncé
Finally a girl who wants me
My more than 90-day fiancée
We could make the perfect team
My South American dream
Couldn't be a catfish scheme, oh no
Christina
I just can't wait to meet ya
Christina
Book the flight so I can see ya
I sent her mucho mucho money
It was for my honey
Did I mention she's a Playboy bunny?
My friends, they did not believe me
Said the situation's creepy
But finally she came to see me
Picked her up she looked a little older
Wider than her picture sold her
But beauty's eye is the beholder
Got her just before the travel ban hit
The timing's perfect
We're quarantined in my apartment
Quaran-Tina
I really couldn't wait to see ya
Quaran-Tina
Now there's all this time for you and me, ah
She has a belt with a lock and key
Practices chastity
Saving herself just for me, I know
Says she doesn't want a prenup
Cause our love was built on real trust
She says "Baby, isn't that enough?" oh-oh
Says she won't be like other wives
She collects hunting knives
And she doesn't value life, much
Said she had a surprise for us
She picked up the coronavirus
So we can share that bond between us
Quaran-Tina
I wish there was a way to leave ya
Quaran-Tina
I'm living out my days in fear, oh no
Played a game of Monopoly
We had a disagreement
She tried to claim that I was cheating
Then she threatened to give me a beating
Leave me in the bedroom bleeding
Maybe she is not the one for me, no no
This relationship is killing me
When I say killing me
She might kill me literally, oh no
Said she was going out for groceries
She went on a killing spree
Kinda glad it wasn't me though
Quaran-Tina
I thought that this would be a dream
Quran-Tina
But it turned into a nightmare scene
Quaran-Tina
Some things aren't always what they seem
Quran-Tina
I blame my friends and eHarmony, oh yeah
Credits
Writer(s): Raymond Edwin Brennan
Lyrics powered by www.musixmatch.com
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