The Vanishing Act

Were you surprised that we never spoke?
That in the still of the night when nothing stirs I woke
And I gathered up some clothes
I never planned on this, but it's the way it goes
And now it all seems too familiar
Like pages turned on calendars that
Give the same 12 months to fuck things up
Year after year

And I can't believe how down I am
Like a well
Being lowered in
The water stops
The bucket drops
It's farther and farther down
Farther and farther down

Well, I guess you never knew me
Or at least not well enough
And so I fill my gut
With that dark red wine
'Til my brain shuts off
And my eyes go blind
You won't see me there
In that thick black air
Yeah, I'll finally make something disappear

'Cause I've been practicing disappearing
And I think that I got it down
Now there's no sun
It's just a cellar
Nowhere a sky
Just that black, black dirt, yeah
Now there's no sun
It's just a cellar
Nowhere a sky
Just that black, black, black, black dirt

Expanding outwards
Just echoes for answers
Not that it matters
It's backward
It's forwards

Unhappy lovers
With baskets of flowers
Use them as markers
The place where your bed once stood
At the time when it still felt good

But you'll get that feeling back
Yeah, you just need some time to think
And to add up the Hell
Get it straight in your mind
But to calculate costs
That may take some time

But I'm sure you'll get to feeling better
Yeah I just need some time to drink
So, I fill my gut
With that blood red wine
'Til my insides swim
And my veins unwind

I'll be riding there
In that hot white air
Once that something's gone
It might never reappear
It might never reappear
It might never reappear
It might never reappear