Car Boot Killer

Woke up on Friday morning with not a penny to my name
Spent last night down the boozer and pissed it all down the drain
I had to get me some money, had to find it real quick
So then I had an idea, just goes to show I'm not so thick

I'd carry out a killing, but maybe not the one you expect
So for me to get money, I needed things to collect
Cos I think I'd make a killing in a Car Boot sale
Yes I think I'd make a killing and I ain't gonna fail

Went searching in the attic and then down the shed
Even looked in the spare room and under my bed
And I found

Cardboard boxes filled with cuddly toys
An old guitar that made too much noise
An empty bathtub with a rubber duck
Some cricket bats and a hockey puck
A torn pool table and a wonky cue
A cordless kettle that's almost new
A globe of the world and a bunch of keys
A threadbare carpet infested with fleas

Because I'd make a Car Boot killing
Yes I'd make a Car Boot killing

Cluedo, scrabble and monopoly
A kitchen table from an old oak tree
A box of quavers past their sell-by date
Evel Knievel and a roller skate
A dozen LP's and some rusty files
Pots and pans and some bathroom tiles
A Tonka toy and a babys pram
I just can't believe how lucky I am

Because I'd make a Car Boot killing
Yes I'd make a Car Boot killing

Evel Knievel and a babys pram
I just can't believe how lucky I am
Evel Knievel and a babys pram
I just can't believe how lucky I am

I'm a Car Boot killer
I'm a Car Boot killer
I'm a Car Boot killer
I'm a Car Boot killer