Not-So-Loving Lover-Boy

Why do women pick fuckboys over gentlemen
Just so when they settle in, he's runnin' out the door again
After some other bitch, so you probably won't see him again
I may be wrong, this shit depends
If he comes back to make amends
After leaving ya', he don't even apologize and
Made you look at love as lies, well why do I try
To tell the truth and give it to you straight
So don't cry
When this shit comes crashing down and you start screaming
Oh, why

That's the issue, I'm that nigga running from you
I'm too scared to get attached, so I just leave after I fuck you
I'm running from relationships and after I would come to
Or in you
I'm scared of emotions I would run into
This how I imagine how my thoughts go on and on
If this were to happen with a girl I'm leading on
I'm mentally unstable, but can't show cause it's a turnoff
Like the wart, had on my thumb, the doctor had to burn off
Regardless of it all, I would go and have a ball
My phone would be a hot line
And mama sayin' Oh Lord
MATEØ, you need to stop being a damn whore
If this shit continues, you gon' get what you've been asking for
I said whatever, didn't think about it too much
And proceeded to meet up with girl and
She made me fucking bust

On top of that
I'm just a really pessimistic piece of shit
That doesn't quit, when it comes to overthinking
I ruin relationships
Because I think of stupid shit
That anchors in my chest, and now I'm sinking
And drowning in anxiety
And guilt that stays inside of me, for every scenario I be making
Wish that I could pick up all the thoughts that
Drag me further to insanity and
Lock em' all away and
Don't forget to lose the fucking key
I put on a front so all the girls will think I'm different
To hide all of these suicidal thoughts that I be thinking
But come to think of it, it's not very efficient
Man, fuck it, I made it this far
But I'm still singing
I'm not the greatest person for someone to fall in love with
I've made this very clear, me and dating doesn't function
For fun shit to happen
Instead, I stay rapping
On topics I've spoke of, and people still laughing
It hurts cause the things in these songs really happen
Like fucking these girls over
It's leaving me asking
Why do I always hurt the ones with good intentions
Whenever I sense tension or some heartbreak being mentioned
The feelings were sincere, why the fuck I ain't pay attention

And all the girls I push away, due to my actions
Used to wonder why it happened
Now I know, so I'm just sad and
At a loss for words, because I know they make things worse
And shout out Trey, but I think I'm the one
That truly is a curse
Am I a curse to all my friends too
I wonder
The negative overthinking really tries to put me under
And suffer to make me think I'm overlooked as negative to others

But am I
What if I am
Goddamn, what if I really am

I can't be around someone who's fueled by
Bitterness and negativity
Well then, what are you doing here
What happened, BoJack
Same thing that always happens
You didn't know me