Separation

I still hold this trauma
In my hands
I'm sifting through it like grains of sand
I still wander back to
Where this all began
I have to face what I can't stand

I'm 29 with no real prospects
All I do is stay up
(And self numb)
Need to reframe my mental process
Grind hard stay young

But what I don't understand
Is how come nothing goes as planned
(I'm playing the victim in my story)

Been dwelling on what I can't erase
(What I can't erase)
I drink the poison I love the taste
(I drink the poison I love the taste)
I'll learn that I'm not my mistakes
(I'm bleeding from the inside)
There's so much love that I'll create
(Not flowing, but growing)

I still hold this trauma
In my hands
I'm sifting through it like grains of sand
I still wander back to
Where this all began
It is my goal to understand
What this means for me
I can't seem
To get grip on myself
But I choose to live in this hell

These fractured pieces are still lingering
But it's my job to make things rights
I'll have to learn while in this fight

I may not be winning
But my eyes still glisten
I may not be winning
But my eyes still glisten
When I show you my love