Ace of Spades

I wanna tell you about the strongest grief
that I've been gripped by,
there's no relief for losing a person
without being able to say goodbye.

He was an old man that I cared about,
who fought but eventually had to fade out.

The last time we talked it was an argument
and now he's sleeping in the firmament,
I wish I could turn back time and wave goodbye,
one last kiss, one last glimpse of seeing him alive.

Take me back to 2008 when happiness with you
was just having an ace of spades,
and suddenly in that sunny day,
I realized that even happiness fades.

Years going by and your memories start dismembering,
don't know why when you lose someone
then it gets it so hard to remember them.

This multifaceted unpredictable nature of existence
makes a person lose consistence and then fade away,
while others mourning the loss are only left to decay.
But I didn't cry 'cause I know he's still there in my mind.

I refused to talk to God and ask him why
'cause the best I could receive
could be just a wet answer from the sky.

"Why don't you go visit his grave?"
I don't why but my heart seems a cave
"Did you forget how much that he cared?"
My ventricles are opened cells, in which sorrow dwells.

Today I was watching old clips in which he appears,
the sound of his voice brought me to tears.

Those memories made me feel a bit overwhelmed
thus my eyes felt condemned.
I haven't listened to that voice for a long time
that I almost forgot its nature,
it felt like the essence of basil lost in its prime
but now we can finally be tasting its flavour.

His house is so empty now that there's only his wife,
all that remains is only the memories she won't let them die.

The smell of shaving foam makes my hippocampus roam,
it's my Madeleine de Proust but these memories bite and are sawtoothed