Love in my heart

I didn't want to write, but let's assume it's a personal diary
I am feeling this intolerable, deeply saddened by hurt
my heart's, my delicate heart's enduring

once abused used to be trauma
then it turned to something I cry over
but without storing in me
Now i feel unconditional love most, for them all
When they are still continuing abuse
Collar my neck, beating
from physical to emotional
This is all so convoluted
this is so kean that cuts, bleeds, hurts the most later

only have some telepathic connection with my fam
M mostly 5D, still no my desired Reality manifested
They can't be there with me
where these dark people are with me, nothing out,
nothing's outside changed
but I am alone standing with love in my hearts
This is unendurable
but Iam still here

I have no guard, no protection
Iam healed as hell
but still being attacked
I have no way to run, I can't
no money, no my house
just this convoluted experience
with love in my heart, still for all
because we are all one

I am highly tired, frustrated, dieing
but m.
paralyzed by shock, tolerating all...
every time I go open to love humans most of em' close me
I try to be who I am no matter what
to hold my true love vibration inside
not affected by outside
but I have feelings too.

they abuse me for what they do
for what they taught me to do
for what they actually perform
the whole narcissistic abuse diary.

But.
but I am alone standing with love in my hearts
This is unendurable
but Iam still here

I have no guard, no protection
Iam healed as hell
but still being attacked
I have no way to run, I can't
no money, no my house
just this convoluted experience
with love in my heart, still for all
because we are all one

it's like I can't escape, nor do I wanna
coz, outside is inside, outside is inside
coz, outside is inside
inside is outside
coz, outside is inside
inside is outside

fully afraid to lose my balance
still i try my best(even though)
I come to them(even though)
or I just don't, they come still
and I'm really tired of being attacked
but I accept coz I have no other way
Just to be love in my heart for all it...