The Joys

I was nine, playing Kirby with a can after school
Still in my uniform, yellow polos black jumpers too
With a cork in my head ready to fizz up like a bottle of Prosecco
With confessions that nobody knew
Stay strong, look up and take it all on the chin
But my shoulders feeling colder than it's already been
Am I a different breed of person, one that doesn't deserve half of what I wanted
I'm exhausted

I'm not afraid anymore of when they talk
I lie, I'm terrified of it sometimes
I can't define it myself
But the joys, the joys, the joys of living
With you my love it makes the difference
I feel that I can mend the past with you

Then the adolescence hit us with a hint of revolution
Take the realisation that the people are pollution
I'm not having it, I'll make a name for myself
Regardless of opinion, I'm the best around
And I sit and judge silence but don't stand up for it out loud
For the fear of repercussions
I don't want to drag myself down anymore than I need to
And I tell myself

I'm not afraid anymore of when they talk
I lie, I'm terrified of it sometimes
I can't define it myself
But the joys, the joys, the joys of living
With you my love it makes the difference
I feel that I can mend the past with you
If it takes us years I'll be there beside you too