10/11/2002

Aye
I woke up about two hours ago
And um
Some weird going on but I don't know
I don't like being lied to
That's one of my big things
But
I guess stuff Ion like keep happening to me
And I don't know why

It had started when I tried to be a trapper a robber
Lean in my cup and I told them that I ain't sipping on water
And I just wanted that attention and the love from my father
And she would get it from her people
I guess that I bought her
And you was 'pose to be my brudda cuz I called you my bro
Sippin' on lean straight by the case my brudda died when he told
I'm like a rose petal in the garden that's refusing to grow
Stay by myself and I just know that I been begging for more

My heart been broke so many times meet me at the crossroads
And since a youngin' I know Fredo said to stay on my own
I'm 17 but they look at me and they think that I'm 20
I'm making sure that this for me and I ain't worried bout no money
And he keep acting like he real he tryna live through his children
And I was tryna catch a high I'm smoking dope by the building
I know they envy and watching me like they was a scout
And I was sitting by myself I'm smoking weed by the ounce
And I had went through all this pain that's where I learnt all my knowledge
And I keep checking my phone because I hope that you calling
And I just can't say it out loud cuz my emotions are falling
And I know you got expectations and you wish that I'm balling
You thinking that you hard and you throw gang signs like you were a member
And everytime I go to sleep you know I think bout September
I had a dream the other night that they was splitting my wig
Yeah
And I don't know
What to do

It had started when I tried to be a trapper a robber
Lean in my cup and I told them that I ain't sipping on water
And I just wanted that attention and the love from my father
And she would get it from her people
I guess that I bought her
And you was 'pose to be my brudda cuz I called you my bro
Sippin' on lean straight by the case my brudda died when he told
I'm like a rose petal in the garden that's refusing to grow
Stay by myself and I just know that I been begging for more

It never dawned on me that I was the one hurting my mama
Cuz I was worried bout the drugs and I was tryna get commas
Chasin' my dream and I remember when I spoke about rapping
And I just thought the only way was to invest in some trapping
Get on my bike I'm up the road I'm selling weed on the highway
I'm coming home I pop some pills because I had me a long day
And if you wanna lie to me then you can go on your own way
And I keep feeling like I'm lost so I don't know what I'm gone say
See I was hurting I was lost and I just needed some saving
And I was gonna kill myself but I didn't cuz of Raven
And I had prayed the other night and I had asked for a blessing
And why you never call my phone you always sending a message
And they don't understand the hurt when you see them bullets flying
And I will wear a smile on my face at night I be crying
And I just wish that you would tell the truth and stop with the lying
I don't know how to feel about it right now
Man rest in peace FBG Duck I know that yo gun was loaded
You made a lot of promises I hope that we can go blow it
And you would get up in that rental and drive it like it's stolen
I

It had started when I tried to be a trapper a robber
Lean in my cup and I told them that I ain't sipping on water
And I just wanted that attention and the love from my father
And she would get it from her people
I guess that I bought her
And you was 'pose to be my brudda cuz I called you my bro
Sippin' on lean straight by the case my brudda died when he told
I'm like a rose petal in the garden that's refusing to grow
Stay by myself and I just know that I been begging for more
It had started when I tried to be a trapper a robber
Lean in my cup and I told them that I ain't sipping on water
And I just wanted that attention and the love from my father
And she would get it from her people