Regrets

Bases loaded, what's the flex? Here's to all who's hopin'
Crosses up for the hex, for the language she spoke in
Was kinda cryptic- I'm building up all this interest
Losing all of my patience, torn trying to fix this
Just let me feel for a while, nothin' less, nothin' more
I've been stressed, in denial I confess I've been lured
Down a path that many seem to lose hope
But I've been told by prophets that God will align my scope
His vision is clear, now its time to focus
It's kinda hard to have faith when things look atrocious
Sworn to be elite amongst my peers
Been thrown in the fire, I've shed many tears
Found comfort in the silence- balancing my fears
Tryna rid them all while shifting through these gears
It seems that's all I talk about
Middle fingers to this process- I'm walking out

And it seems I'm turning into someone I don't like
Where's the fight? Where's the bright light?
And it seems I'm turning into someone who will find
A little more life- give me peace of mind

Been speeding down the same highway for years
Validation is poison- I ignore the cheers
But kinda hope for a little praise- I'm weak minded
I lost my faith- can you help me find it?
I misplaced it with the baggage that I've kept
It's been on an overflow now it's up to my neck
I kinda forget people truly see the best in me
But I'm in a constant battle disturbing my energy
The force is strong; I'm out of options
No more self harm. I'm done with toxins
That binge I had years ago took me under
My fake smile became a crutch and then I wondered
How long will this last? The pain increasing by the second
Didn't know regret and despair can be used as a weapon
And it seems that's all I talk about
Middle fingers to this process- I'm walking out

And it seems I'm turning into someone I don't like
Where's the fight? Where's the bright light?
And it seems I'm turning into someone who will find
A little more life- give me peace of mind