Deciduous

So lay me to rest
September's killing me
The summer's surrender to the cold
Cuts me to the bone

Like the words I cannot speak to you
A testament to the years
I hope that they give you the peace
You always said that you need

And I know that they said
'All of these fears will be gone when we're dead'
And I don't know how
To say I'm scared

It's so long ago
I've forgotten just how it felt
To be walking on auto-pilot
Through the Tesco's on Nicolson St

Standing in the aisles
Staring at nothing; no deals or relief
My eyes glaze over; the tears
We fall to the ground like deciduous leaves

And I know they said
'All of these fears will be gone when we're dead'
And I don't know how
To say I'm scared

See how much has changed
In the time it takes to leave

At the end of a night I should've left long ago
Spent watering my demons so I won't go alone
To that blurring of thoughts washed away and forgotten
Except the cold of the funeral and the tears of your father
Choke on the unspoken promises of dreams
The quiet of coffins; cobblestoned empty sea
We fell into place; like an explosion reversed
Everything was beautiful and everything hurt