In Case You’re Lonely

I haven't felt for a long time
I'd take my life but it's not mine
I'll sift through this gallery
of photographs and memories
And desperately search for an answer
And I hate the way you look through me
Here's full transparency;
I hate myself more than I loved you
And every time you tried to help
I wished that I was someone else
I hate myself more than I loved you
Turn around, you tower me,
shadowing my everything
If that's what you want then it's alright
And I'll smoke all of the pain away
until you think that I'm okay
If that's your grand scheme then it's alright
I'll dig a hole until my arms go numb,
watch the earth pile up
If that's what you want then it's alright
You're forgetting me, our memories
are worthless things you'll never need
'Cause that's what you want and it's alright
If that's what you want then that's fine
You notice every move I make
Watching closing for the moment that I break
Into flaws like fragments I can't mend
Pick myself apart until there's nothing left
There's something about me I can't help
I'm mint condition in the box right on your shelf
But you won't take me out and hold me
I'm just there in case you're lonely
(I've been accused, I've been accosted,
I was amused, now i'm exhausted)