The Woman From Brussels

The woman from Brussels
Had big hairy mussels
And chips on a plate
For lunch one day

As she gulped her strong
Belgian beer in the sun
He caught her eye
And knew she was the one

No-one said what they were thinking
That she smoked cigars and had hair like Tintin
The two young lovers didn't seem that suited
He had slip-on shoes and she had lace-up booties

Ah! He just could not resist her
Even though he knew she was a Belgian weightlifter

He loved the feeling
Of the powdered chalk
As he held her hand
When they went for a walk

He would feed her
Belgian chocs
You know she needed to keep
Her glucose levels up

Love overwhelmed him, he couldn't stop it
A girlfriend from Belgium - it seemed so exotic
He'd eat his brussel sprouts with relish
And spit at everyone as he tried to learn Flemish

Ah! He just could not resist her
Even though he knew she was a Belgian weightlifter

You didn't need
To be Hercule Poirot
To see that the cracks
Were starting to show

They had to go
Their separate ways
Her physical demands
Left him in a daze

All he wanted was a little kiss
But she would wind him with her snatch and lift
She was like Jean-Claude van Damme
As she crushed his dumbbells in her hand

Ah! She was strong and he just could not resist her
Cos he was just a waiter and she was a weightlifter

Now the woman from Brussels
Has gone and the fuss'll
Die down now we're sure
She won't be round anymore

She got herself
In a right old mess
At a tournament
She failed a urine test

And now he's kicked those Brussels blues
He's been knocked out flat in love by a shot putter from Bruges
And she is huge



Credits
Writer(s): Arnold Widdowson
Lyrics powered by www.musixmatch.com

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