Purgatory Origami

I just been trying
For wishful thinking
But I've been worried 'bout you so what's the point
Cause I been hoping
And I've been wondering
If you'll ever come round this part

Cause I live with a figment of you
Based upon the things that I've been thru
And I'll fool myself a time or two
Saying I don't care for you

But I know what's real when the lights get dark
And I know I feel too much to start
When I'm planning for my next mistake
I'm abandoning what faith could make
If I knew what's best I would take my time
But I'm so clueless when it comes to life
When I'm tearing
My heart out
For you

Come out when you want
Or just stay instead
Doesn't matter when you live in my head
I don't think you know
Just how bad it gets
And I don't think you care about now

Take time when you need to figure it out
And go live life so that you are here and now
But at no expense you'll try to cause me some pain
And I'd take it just so I could feel you again

I'm not in hell
But I've
Been here before
And while it's
Better now
I'm not quite sure
If this is heaven yet
But while I wait
I'll take the time
To try
To get to know this place

When you want to say
That I'm not really over it
You state a case
'Cause you don't want it to quit

And I know,
I got faults
But at least I will admit them,
You won't,
Take the blame
For all those you've offended
You're just,
Like your parents
Who you,
Have resented
'Cause you could never learn
And I just think that it's funny
That you're oblivious
That you are living a comedy
Based off repetition

You don't wanna act your age
Cause you never make change
And you wonder why you waste time

(Instrumental)

I've been trying to say
I'm killing time
When folding again
Then I unwind
You wish you could
And you'll say so
I'm strung up on it
And your halo

Whether I wait
It doesn't mean that I am trying
You bat ahead
But doesn't mean that you're alive
Falling apart
'Cause then I would ask why
You'll never say
When you look me in the eye

And I just wanna leave it
To come through us all
But you just wanna take it
And hold to your soul
I've been amazed that you cannot see
You're tucked inside like origami

I've been trying to say
I'm killing time
When folding again
Then I unwind
You wish you could
And you'll say so
I'm strung up on it
And your halo

Instead of just sulking
I'm looking for trouble
Wherever it comes my way
Your temper's tempting me to stay
But I'm not angry anyway
I'm just looking for my day

(Okay)

Well I can stay and talk
And say too much
But if I do then I
Won't learn enough
I don't take advice
It makes me dumb
But I think I'll listen for once

And I know I'm not worthless but I'll tell you
That I feel I deserved it when that's not true
I could sit here and cry
When I don't need to
So I'm saying goodbye
'Cause I've got things to do

I've just been wanting to know
If I had been told a lie
'Cause you were trying to spare my feelings
When I was opening up
I thought that you were alright
But then I found that you're a bad person

But I feel grateful for all that had come
'Cause I'm still alive and having fun
And through my own hands I'll become
Someone better off alone

And I know I'm not worthless but I'll tell you
That I feel I deserved it when that's not true
I could sit here and cry
When I don't need to
So I'm saying goodbye
'Cause I've got things to do