Bonus Track (Thoreau Full Version)

Excuse me if I start to get into my feels
Mental health is serious to me
So, I ask you to beg my pardon
As it's about to get real- for reals
I'm Seeking a salve for this hell
In which I dwell
The walls closing in
My heartbeat is palpitating
My Thoughts are racing
All I could do is scream in the wind
No one can hear me it's infuriating
I knocked myself around a bit
Drowning in the blame game
And playing what if
The tyranny of being in a pit of despair
In an all too familiar dystopia
And no one even cares
I've played out the scenarios
This ain't my end game
I'm no Dr. Strange

Like the quote by Henry David Thoreau
Most men lead lives of quiet desperation
I'm afraid I'm in the mean
Resigned to a mode of existence in my life's current manic gestation
Or some median facsimile, or am I just a simulation
I once tied my identity to a mere mortal
Who I treated like a deity
She soon shuttled off her mortal coil
Laid me to rest in a baren waste land
Buried my heart deep in the earths soil
Too much ado about nothing, they say life will begin again
What's the definition of insanity if one's life repeats the same trend

I've shifted blame, it does not lessen the pain
I've tried to chemically treat the burden, living life sober is too mundane
My heart has gotten colder as I've gotten older. My mind is a Petrie dish of the abstract inconsequential, and insane
How does one reconcile living and adapting to a world that you didn't ask to be a part of
How does one find their flow, amidst a vacuum devoid of love
The answer is rhetorical, it's something i think about daily
I once heard that when you know your why you can deal with anyhow, I believe that was Nietzsche
I guess I'm just giving voice to the tired
The downtrodden and those in desperation
I'm presenting my testimony of the heart and how it feels cathartic I hope it's someone's inspiration
Know that you're not alone and it's okay to scream.
Before I go sleep at night, I often wonder am I real or is this someone's dream