Just Say No

What does it take
To decide to run
For vice president
Of middle school?
Do you have to think
You're not good enough
Or maybe think the guy
Who's running for president
Is cool?

Or cute
Painfully so
Looking at the back of his neck
In Spanish class
At his mole
Memorizing it
Wanting to touch it
That smooth, brown skin
Hearing rumours
About him

Girls giving him blow jobs
In bathrooms at parties
And not being able to get that image
That thought
Out of your head
Endless replay
Night and day

When I was vice president
There was a drug bust
At the local high school
Parents were all up in arms
And the newspapers too

And girls are on their knees
In bathrooms
Fumbling with his
Zipper
Pulling back his white
Tight underwear

The parents started setting their sights
On the younger kids
Trying to catch them
Before they went to hell
If all this shit
Was going on in high school
It must be starting
Somewhere else

The president's penis
All hard and ready
And waiting
The Parent Teacher Association
Was going to have an emergency meeting
To set a strategy
To just say no
I wanted to go

I'm looking up at him
From below
Looking at his
Lustful, dark, dreamy, brown eyes
Looking down at me
Begging me to start

I started a petition
Which was a bit of a repetition
The last one I started
Was something about
Being anti-crime
Making a pledge to intervene
Or something
Who knows?

He's waiting for me
To lick it
Stop it, stop it, stop it
I have a girlfriend
Stop it!

The anti-crime petition
Got lots of signatures
It was a minor success
More successful, I thought
Than when I took lung samples
Around to science classes

Eaten up by tobacco smoke
Blackened by tar
Prone to cancer
And emphysema

Does he even notice me?
What if he noticed me?
What if somehow I ended up
In the bathroom at a party with him?

Then I started smoking clove cigarettes
Not kidding myself
They were anything other
Than flavoured tobacco

What if he locked the door
And locked eyes with me
And
Shit, shit, shit, stop it

But the flavour
Of the clove cigarettes was tasty
And when you laid down
And huffed them in
And then sprang up again
You got mighty light headed

Your brain crackled
Like cloves seeds
It was fun to do with friends
You didn't have to say anything
Just smoke and laugh
And repeat and repeat and repeat

Precum, precum
Shit, shit
Girls' breasts
Vaginas
And precum
Precum

There were reporters at the PTA meeting
Where I presented my petition
Saying that the signatories
Almost every student in the student body
Hadn't and knew no one who had
Bought, sold or used drugs at school

How can I get alone with him?
Why don't we have
More student council meetings?
Why didn't he come to the PTA meeting?
I'm just the vice president

He's probably got a soccer game or something
His legs
Polyester, shiny shorts
Fuck!

I was careful with the wording
So I could sign the petition
With a clear conscience
But then it was pointed out to me
I'd made a spelling error
God damn it!
I'd already made all the copies
And people were already signing them
Fuck, fuck, fuck

Licking his neck
His mole
Touching his
Always perfectly-shaped black hair
No, girl's hair and body and girl's tummy
His precum is so runny

A reporter took my photo
At the PTA meeting
Holding the pages of student signatures
And my misspelled word
But when the papers came out
They ended up printing
An angry photo of the superintendent instead

I cut the article out anyway
And put it in my scrapbook
Carefully highlighting
My printed name
In red

I wish I was dead
Precum
Lots of precum
I wish I was dead
Precum
Dead
Precum
Dead



Credits
Writer(s): Brian Gross
Lyrics powered by www.musixmatch.com

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