Peephole (feat. Aaron May)

It's been a while since I let go of these thoughts
I don't really like to talk too much
Been really thinking bout them drugs
I might've bought too much
Been really sinking in this mud
Might start copping by the jug
Let em judge
Tell 'em they ain't never walked thru such
Pain
Fuckin' with love I done lost too much
So now I look around the shrugs
Cus these bitches be bad than a mug
But I promise you they cost too much
My time is everything and I already spent too many
Hours
Fuckin' on hoes
And smoking on flowers
Missin my goals
Just losing my power
I pray for God to show for better things
Money ain't make me
But it made me play the Devils game
Everything fake now I can't believe in everything
Main reason I don't do relationships and wedding rings
I watched my mama struggle tryna feed us by herself
Before I make a bitch a trophy wife
I leave her on the shelf
Looking pretty
Go collect another nigga's pity
I ain't that type of rapper you won't catch me in yo city
And if niggas wanna catch me
They goin' catch me holding 50
It's been way too many close calls
I watched the world turn they back on me
Then turned back
I let em in and did em wrong I think they earned that
They say you live and learn
But in this shit
I see somethings I gotta unlearn
Tell me where I learned that
Tell me where I learned that
Look
Tell me where do you go?
When you ain't got no one for you to go and lean on
Watching through the peephole
Stab wounds in my back from the ones I called my equals
Lose my trust once and you won't see me for the sequel
Been hustling for my kin
Learned to live and let live
Do me wrong that just show me you ain't comfortable in yo skin
All I kno is keep it real
All the fake shit don't appeal
The cloth that I'm raised from
Don't rip regardless of the tear
Been awhile since I shed a tear
Cryin' always been a fear
Dyin' always been ideal
Searching for a why to stay alive
I ain't find it yet
What the fuck my purpose in this Life?
Someone answer this
Praying to a God in the skies show me sympathy
Give me a sign to trust my loved ones consistently
I wanna feel like they all for me
But it's killing me
I swear I done gave my brothers fake piss
And I gave 'em half's worth of shake, Shit
I'm just tryna help make some shit shake
I don't want the credit man I been paid
I only give love it ain't reciprocated ten ways
And I don't do nothing in hopes of reciprocation
It's all love till it ain't
Once it's lost ain't no replacing
They say if it's real it'll come back
But I feel like if it was real it woulda never have left
I don't trip too much unless I'm takin drugs in excess
Said I don't trip too much unless I'm takin drugs in excess
I swear I forget and move on way too fast
Prolly better that way
Scared of being attached
My heart, my soul can't take no more
Tryna give you my thoughts all from this Peephole