Dear Me

She was the answer to my soul
The greatest love I'd know
She'd kiss my hand and set fire
To my dark soul, and now she's nowhere
And now the memory of her smile
Is like a constant trial
Her tiny hands around mine
Her laugh a curse inside my dead eyes
And there's no way out
I can't hear a sound

Dear me when I am older. Do you want to play?
Do you think there's any more space for another holiday?
Remember how it felt when you were just a boy
There's always room for love and friendship
And evil answers to joy

You know it's time for you to move
You've got nothing left to prove
Her death inside your anger
But her life deserves to shine much brighter
I'm begging for the me I knew
To show me what I have to do
I see your light inside you
I wonder if that light sees me too
You know it won't go out
It calls my name out loud

Dear me when I was younger. Listen as I say
There's a child inside you longing, for just a holiday
Don't forget the childhood romance, of living life with joy
There's always room for love and friendship
In the heart of a little boy

And even though you miss her still today
There's still a world to celebrate
But you need to participate
You'll find your answer just behind the rib cage

Dear me, I heard your laughter calling me this way
The memory of love was enough for a little holiday
Inside of death, and hate, and horror, I found a source of joy
It lives inside of love and friendship, and making joyful noise