Anhedonia

--donia!
Yeah
Hey, hey, hey
Hey
I got Anhedonia
Fuck, fuck, fuck

Cuz my
Head hurts
And I can't make bad decisions
So I go keep my body checked
'Fore I take my life and miss it (Bitch I'm)
Dangerous
When my head is in collision
And my feet in the ignition
Glad my sense of self is rigid
Who's that in the mirror?
Bitch, don't ask! (Who's that?)
I can't answer that
Family be like "you need therapy for your head" again (You right)
"All the shit you do got consequences, that's forever"
Then tell me why you say "live in the present" then?
It's evident

I got anhedonia, fuck
Yeah I'm feeling numb (Feeling numb)
I'll be in my zone, I think I've seen enough
I got anhedonia, fuck
Yeah I'm feeling numb, (Hey, hey)
Defenses all around me, I can't risk, I'm done
Anhedonia (I'm)
Walking like a soldier does
Getting too emotionless, feel like no one know what's up
Looking from the shoulder up
Feeling empty, cold and numb

Been living numb, I don't know what I finna do
Trinna be nice, still all they do is ridicule
That's me at ten, as a kid, body miniscule
Compared to now but the brain was a bigger tool
Than to most of the kids in school
Once a kid starting beating me, so I hit his knee with my tennis shoe
And I still achieve what my head into
I was already thinking of killing but I never made it true
Self-harm too but no, I never made a mov
Wanted to live, just not like that, shit is true
You looked at me like I'm innocent
I think I made everybody a little fool
Starting from seven 'till middle-school
What kept me here was my brother, and singing too
Nothing that I wouldn't do, that's for either of you
Rainy days in the city proved to be my comfort
I guess pain is beautiful
Look in the mirror, is that really you?
Are emotions pitiful? Really, I'm sick of you
I'mma rap, when you listen, know that I just spit on you
Now you can hate while I'm reaching my pinnacle
When I got hit I was hitting you
Now in a few years I'll have money to put out a hit on you!
Numb day, much rain
Falling down the window of a bus on a monday
Fuck's sake, what's pain?
Is it mundane?
Cuz if there's more I'mma run 'way
Feel like I'm standing in it, still nobody sees me
I'm a fucked up kid, didn't know I was competing
My luck's done, dead, that's a front, but it's bleeding, ah!

--got anhedonia, fuck!
Yeah I'm feeling numb, (Feeling numb)
I'll be in my zone, I think I've seen enough
I got anhedonia, fuck
Yeah I'm feeling numb
Defenses all around me, I can't risk, I'm done

Anhedonia
Walking like a soldier does
Getting too emotionless, feel like no one know what's up (Hey, hey)
Looking from the shoulder up, feeling empty, cold and numb
And I like it too