The Miller Line

If you ever find yourself in the USA
Somewhere between New York and LA
And you need to know some information
Some sports results, sit-com facts, or your next destination
Just buy yourself a can of Miller beer
For the help you need, you'll find right here
Because everything's gonna to be just fine
If you phone the Miller Line

One. Two. Three. Four

If you can't think of something and it's giving you the shits
Call 1800-Miller-6
They'll give you the answer lickety-split
Call 1800-Miller-6
They tell it like it is with no dodgy gimmicks
Call 1800-Miller-6
Service with a smile and no melodramatics
Call 1800-Miller-6

For the latest Miller product for you alcoholics
Call 1800-Miller-6
If you need the phone number for some drug trial clinics
Call 1800-Miller-6
If prank calls are how you get your kicks
Call 1800-Miller-6
To hear the latest banging dance remix
Call 1800-Miller-6

Coz it's Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Time
To call the Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Line
Coz it's Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Time
To call the Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Line
If you need some help, it's your best lifeline
Call the Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Line

If you need to know how to spell prophylactics
Call 1800-Miller-6
If you want to know Spaceman Africa lyrics
Call 1800-Miller-6
To settle a dispute about DC Comics
Call 1800-Miller-6
The Miller Line, it's the dog's bollocks
Call 1800-Miller-6

Coz it's Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Time
To call the Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Line
Coz it's Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Time
To call the Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Line
If you need some help, it's your best lifeline
Call the Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Line

Just ask your question to the operator
There's Jane; there's Carl and Blaine
And tell 'em Spaceman sent ya

Coz it's Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Time
To call the Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Line
Coz it's Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Time
To call the Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Line
If you need some help, it's your best lifeline
Call the Mill-mill-mill-mill Miller Line
Coz it's Miller Time
To call the Miller Line
Coz it's Miller Time
To call the Miller Line

If you need to get your Miller Beer fix
Call 1800-Miller-6
If you just wanna talk about your favourite topics
Call 1800-Miller-6
If you wanna know what's the best cake-mix
Call 1800-Miller-6
If you're seeing ghosts and apparitions
Call 1800 ... Ho ho. STOP. Stop. Stop Stop. Stop
If you are seeing ghosts and apparitions
I suggest you call the Ghostbusters
But for everything else, I recommend the Miller Line
On 1800-Miller-six