Zalgo

You can't parse xhtml with regex
Because html can't be parsed by regex
Regular expressions are a tool
That is insufficiently sophisticated
To understand the constructs employed by html
Even enhanced irregular regular expressions
As used by perl are not up to the task
Of parsing html
You will never make me crack
Every time you attempt to parse html
With regular expressions
The unholy child weeps the blood of virgins
And Russian hackers pwn your webapp
Parsing html with regex
Summons tainted souls into the realm of the living
Html and regex go together like love
Marriage
And ritual infanticide
The force of regex and html
Together in the same conceptual space
Will destroy your mind
Like so much watery putty
If you parse html with regex
You are giving in to them
And their blasphemous ways
Which doom us all to inhuman toil
For the one
Whose name cannot be expressed
In the basic multilingual plane

He comes
It is too late
It is too late

The transgression of a child
Ensures regex will consume all living tissue
Except for html which it cannot
As previously prophesied
Dear lord help us
How can anyone survive this scourge
Using regex to parse html
Has doomed humanity to an eternity
Of dread torture and security holes
Using regex as a tool
To process html
Establishes a breach between this world
And the dread realm of corrupt entities
Like sgml entities
But more corrupt
A mere glimpse of the world
Of regex parsers for html
Will instantly transport
A programmer's consciousness
Into a world of ceaseless screaming

He comes
He comes
He comes
Do not fight
He comes

Html tags leaking from your eyes
Like liquid pain
The song of regular expression parsing
Will extinguish the voices
Of mortal man from the sphere
I can see it
Can you see it
It is beautiful
The final snuffing of the lies of man
All is lost
All is lost
The pony

He comes
He comes
He comes

The ichor permeates all
My face
My face
Oh god no
The angels are not real
Zalgo is Tony the Pony
He comes