Big American Headliner

I had me a dream, almost obscene
I never had a dream any finer
I had me a taste in the land of waste
And the dream that we chased
As we became the big American headliner
Oh yeah, uh-huh

Foaming at the mouth as we up and headed south
South of the parallel 49er
Had us a dream of Rolling Stone Magazine
And all the girls they screamed
As we became the big American headliner
Oh yeah, uh-huh

Visions of sold out shows and candy for your nose
In America, anything goes, as we were soon to find
It doesn't matter what they place is
You can act like Oasis
Screw 'til yer blue in the faces
When you become the big American headliner
Oh yeah, uh-huh

And Leno said he loved our sound
As we were the toast of tinsel town
Everyone and their dog came 'round to the scene
To be seen
Well, we did a "guest spot" on Friends
And sang our songs on Letterman
We looked towards the mighty Yen
'Cause the Japanese, the Japanese love the big American headliner
Oh yeah, uh-huh

I woke up in a hotel room
In downtown Saskatoon
We gotta leave this afternoon for Regina

'Cause there, we've got us an opening slot
Them goddamned gigs never pay a lot
My patience, nerves and credit is shot
But tonight we open for
They keep the door
The big American headliner
Oh, yeah

And we gotta be on at 9er
And off by half past 9er
Oh, yeah
And we can't use their drum riser
So we drink their fucking rider
Oh yeah, uh-huh
The big American Headliner