Crowns

In 2020 I learned about the healing properties of rest
And the true value of reflection
Because in 2019 I'd lost my husband to homicide
I lost my best friend to betrayal and I lost my brother to,
Well I lost him coz that nigga is a thief and is on drugs
And he assaulted me and stole my car.
After the third loss I moved out of my hometown
For the first time in 28 years.
I started 2020 completely alone, like literally and figuratively,
Like it was just me, and my mind was on the get-back.
My plan was to replace everything I'd lost the previous year
and shit on everyone back in Philly.
But 2020 had plans of its own.
Quarantine was exactly the thing
that I never knew I really needed.
Being on lockdown did not change my goals of getting back,
But what I actually got back was worth so much more
than I was originally aiming for.
I got back the sense of peace
I got back to creating
I got back to spending quality time with my children,
I got back to hobbies that I had forgotten that I once loved
2020 taught me beauty rest is deeper
Than me being all cute and bright-eyed
when I wake up in the morning.
After the beauty rest I got in 2020,
My soul feels cute and bright-eyed

Hey y'all, Kevo here, they call me "Doc".
This, was messed up. I tell you, erm, I lost my job.
Really tried very hard to get another job, almost lost that job.
Being in the health sector, working with a pandemic,
Oh man, in this country of ours, it's so, damn, hard.
But we pulled it through. At least I learnt a few lessons.
To be comfortable being alone.
To actually see, that, in real sense,
I have very limited true friends.
That was a hard blow.

Yeah, first of all 2020 was a crazy year
And, what did I learn from it?
I learnt that, well, you matter,
And at the same time you don't matter.
For instance, people stop needing you
The moment they find out that
They can't get from you what they thought
They could get from you.
So, yeah, you have value, until people realize that you're valueless

For me, personally, I didn't achieve not half the goals
I so enthusiastically planned for pre-Covid,
When the year began.
But alas, we make plans,
And God is the ultimate plan-maker.
However, I know, I'm grateful for 2020.
It taught me lessons I didn't even know
Were still teachable for me at my age.
Simplicity of life, and the simplicity of living.
Yeah, I experienced loss and failure.
But I gained valuable lessons about appreciation,
Especially on the re-structuring of family, on health and on money.
I love this quote: 2020 wasn't the year to get everything we wanted
it was the year to appreciate everything we have.

What has 2020 taught me?
Three things made my list: 'Ubhuntu',
"I-I am who you are".
It's, all that mojo that goes with it.
It's that magical word that, that sorts out everything,
And makes you see, the world, in a-in a different light.
I-I discovered, an-an entire colony of amazing people in my flat.
Brillliantly gorgeous sensitive comical industrious,
Not, neighbours, ex-strangers now turned family.
All these [...] filled tables with food delivered
Prescriptions varied each other debunked conspiracies
Dished out face masks.
And asked: Fuelled only by that warm fuzzy gel
That tugs at your heart, when you belong
I-I am no island. "Ubhuntu", "Ubhuntu".
Humanity is, erm, linked by some weird glue,
That binds us beyond our thought

(Fik Made It)
I pray our lines fall in pleasant places
Unnerving seeing the pain in human faces
If life was but a dream then we would chase it
Go down all rabbit holes and we would never grow complacent
I pray our lines fall in pleasant places
Unnerving seeing the pain in human faces
If life was but a dream then we would chase it
Go down all rabbit holes and we would never grow complacent
Whoever thought a handshake would be worth a lot?
I'm betting Dr.Schultz and Calvin laugh a lot
About ending their lives without a thought about
Solving differences coz life is worth a shot
I'm praying for parents enduring pain
Got nothing to feed their kids though they love em to death
I pray for the jobless with bills on your name
Lost all but your sanity now you're feeling insane
And feeling less sane
By the hour every sundown
I bow my knees and pray this dies down
And though it's looking like we lost
We'll rise up from the ashes fingers crossed

I pray our lines fall in pleasant places
Unnerving seeing the pain in human faces
If life was but a dream then we would chase it
Go down all rabbit holes and we would never grow complacent

What I have learnt from 2020, is that,
Anything can happen in this world anytime.
So never wait for tomorrow, never wait for, future.
Do whatever you want to do today.
Change the world, before it changes by itself

Crowns may fall our
Heads can't bear it all but
'slong as we have each other
We'll still win this war

Crowns may fall our
Heads can't bear it all but
'slong as we have each other
We'll still win this war

Crowns may fall our
Heads can't bear it all but
'slong as we have each other
We'll still win this war

I pray our lines fall in pleasant places
Unnerving seeing the pain in human faces
If life was but a dream then we would chase it
Go down all rabbit holes and we would never grow complacent
I pray our lines fall in pleasant places
Unnerving seeing the pain in human faces
If life was but a dream then we would chase it
Go down all rabbit holes and we would never grow complacent
I pray our lines fall in pleasant places
Unnerving seeing the pain in human faces
If life was but a dream then we would chase it
Go down all rabbit holes and we would never grow complacent
I pray our lines fall in pleasant places

My name is Nadia Darwesh
And the lesson that I learnt in 2020,
Is that there is growth in stillness
Defined as a state of unmoving silence,
Stillness isn't something that I ordinarily enjoy.
*Flat line*
However, amid the craziness of last year,
It rescued me from intense anxiety
and brought me to a place of empowerment.
Not quite meditation, and not quite relaxation,
Stillness enabled me to better understand myself.
In the quiet moments of unguided thought,
I was able to reflect on my likes and dislikes,
My hopes and dreams, and most importantly, my values
Doing this helped me tap into a strength that I didn't know I have,
And do things that I had always been too scared to try.
2020 taught me that while stillness isn't always a peaceful exercise
it should be a necessary one.
As such, I plan to incorporate more of it in my life, moving forward.