Eighteen

Tomorrow night I turn eighteen
Tonight, well, I'll just turn the key
To my Grandpa's 2014 Forester
It's kinda funny and it's kinda bittersweet
That my childhood has all led up to me
Drawing tattoos of astrology
In a permanent marker
Took a picture every single night before
Daddy scared me, said that I'll grow out the door
Didn't wanna be a kid no more
It's funny
'Cuz now I'm lying in bed for the eighteenth year
Hasn't hit me next time I won't be here
I'll be sitting in a dorm room
With somebody

And maybe I'll enjoy the freedom
Might be healthy not to see them
This is what you've wanted your whole life
And now I'm standing at the threshold
A million reasons not to let go
A million and one to take the dive

I haven't cried in a while, I cried tonight
And through my door I told a lie
"Mom, I promise everything's alright"
"It's nothing"
But sometimes the world comes caving in
And my stomach turns into the abyss
And I know that something's missing
Can't find something

And maybe I'll like independence
Wear my pride just like a necklace
Independent girls don't need advice
And now I'm standing at the threshold
A million reasons not to let go
A million and one to take the dive

And I'm not scared of my mortality
I think I'm scared of change
Follow tracks that I can't see
I'll focus on the train
Abandoning my adolescence
Don't you think that's strange?
I'm not scared of my mortality
I think I'm scared of change
But I'm seventeen today

Tomorrow night I turn eighteen
Tonight, well, I'll just turn the key
To my Grandpa's 2014 Forester

A million reasons not to let go
A million and one to take the dive