The Very First Time

My story is not about you
I damn near forgot about you
After everything you put me through
How the fuck you expect me to move
Well my narrative it's got a plot
And when you waltzed in it all stopped
Felt like I was stuck in one spot
For a love that ain't real, that's too high of a deal
I can't fuck with it, no
Pack your shit and move on
Think you know me you're wrong
Said I know you better than your mom
I ignored all the signs took you back every time
Say we'll be up for life you can't spell my name right
How I let that shit slide
Looking back blows my mind

Do you love anything
I can't tell from what I've seen
Said you put your trust in me
That was just another scheme
I thought you would show me how to love
Maybe better than the thing that pumps my blood
All you did was show me how to run

Don't think you know what you're running from
I can see he's running from his past, nah
It was way to young you lost your dad
Held down his mom when he was still in class
Nobody ever showed you how to act
He knew money got him more respect
Said fuck the paper baby I write checks
Pick out a new city this one next
Wanted to see him heal he wanted to collect
Wanna know what he feel why we can't connect
Cant be his therapist cause I got my own mess
You can't just fuck me good cause I need more than sex

And I know you got it lemme in your mind
Would've loved all of you if you let me inside
Baby I'm damaged to, need to heal just like you
So I'm putting me first, even though it hurts

Metaphorically think you know what I mean
Should be loved more than material things
It's in me not on me, but why do you want me
Say you like how I walk like I stand six feet tall
When I'm really five five but my energy fills
Up the room like its whole consumed by my vibe
But instead you say love how I'm a good time
When you told me that right there
I damn near cried
When you told me that right there I lost my mind
Thats when I really gave up
Thats when I really gave up.
For the very first time
It was the very first time