Even wit Fate / Today I'm Breathing

Uhhh, wake up and get right to work
I don't got time to be idle, I stay in the cycle of writing a bridge to the verse
While striking the words
I been encouraged to envision and dial the hurt
A nigga been fighting the urge to purge myself, they like to think it's an aversion
Living is learning, I learned my suicidality break the people I love
Women I flirt with, I turned fatality into the reason they shouldn't have left
But in my version, I just expressed the reality
I knew was true to myself
What's for certain just 'cuz I wan' die don't mean I'll do it, yeah, I know I am blessed

Sometimes I say what I mean but don't really mean what I say
My life been made of dreams, the demons gone take me away
Hey, I like the way the fiend said I shouldn't be breathing today
But today I'm breathing, so I'll find a reason to cook and get even wit fate

I awaken, get on the move
Eat some bacon, put on a loop
Music I'm making, giving me fuel
I don't need coffee, still I'm drinking it too
And wit the booze, I get a lil saucy, sorry
My bars be on cue they pawning this shit like porky while I'm so smooth
Fading to even tracks two pieces even the fade
Was made for the speaking, but in this game
Sometimes you speak and get made
I hate convenience, but it's so inconvenient to hate
Delayed the sleeping crazy, now all my sleep is delayed

Sometimes I say what I mean but don't really mean what I say
My life been made of dreams, these demons gone take me away
Hey, I like the way the fiend said I shouldn't be breathing today
But today I'm breathing, so I'll find a reason to cook and get even wit fate

Today I'm breathing, I'll wait to leave here
Babe, somehow you start my heart beating again and again
Today I'm breathing, it's great, I mean it
Maybe all I really need are my friends, my friends, my friends
So I keep on breathing though i dream of leaving
She keep me feeling something deep inside my soul
And today I'm breathing, oh, I'll wait til' the evening
And lay it shamefully, can you clean and shine my woes

Today I'm breathing, I got woes, I got demons
I got flows that I only spit in seasons, ain't tryna teach 'em
The deepest feeling you get when leaving got me believing
That life is deceiving, even wit fate today I'm breathing
So I might just skip all the sleeping and dreaming, flip on a beat and start speaking
Writtens and frees got me making different vibes
They start talking 'bout my youth, but there's where the infant dies
My distant mind found the truth, but now it's back to ignant times
I live wit crimes, acknowledgement in my prime
Don't follow the niggas, blind to the fact that you in a bind on a consistent grind
The wisdom come from all the struggle, insufficient funds
Is commitment supposed to be fun?
We been conditioned that we shouldn't have none
I guess that's where I should've put in a pun
'Bout how relationships are work, you gotta put in the time
But then you couldn't have climbed to the level you at
Is that my narcissism or is that a relevant fact?
I'm hard to listen to for many, hardly, shit that's known by plenty
Off the script, I used to pawn the Henny, nigga wanted pennies
Now I'm onto wantin' Grammys, flauntin' shit like they candies
On the script, I ain't had a plan B
Is that bold? Am I antsy?
I inhale and exhale, life a beach and it's sandy
Gotta flow wit the ocean, gotta trust things you can't see
What crashes crashes, I'm snapping ashes
The gas keep me out the madness and breathing, it's just a practice