Absent Thoughts II

Sitting down in this room thinking bout my purpose
All this work got me confused as if I'm just a servant
When my orders get construed is it called a disservice
Or does my trial and error have my peers think I'm perfect
Vast amounts of growing pains kept my tools dull
Sharpening the iron of who you love clears a smog skull
Smoking mirrors and the ferris wheel make you feel full
The amusement dies when a nine turns a kid ghoul
Bells toll early for the ones with most potential
Cuz the brightest in the room was just god's residuals
So anytime we had find life unbearably miserable
We get touched in physical but feel it spiritual
Minuscule problems adding up as inconvenience
How to be how to speak all for viewership appeasements
When the one you see in the morning before it begins
Tugging on your shoulder with a smolder from negligence

Aye Lamar that's too far don't you preach to em
If it's bars keep it dark you can reach to em
Using spark from ya smarts is a breach to em
But ya art is Rosa Parks give the seats to em

A forgotten soul bottom of the totem pole
Worked the graveyard shift for niggas that were gonna freeze in cold
But what had froze was the soles and their toes
Cuz when I strived for greatness they showed placements where their knives were stowed
Bold brazen bastards barely breathing being briskly banished
But I established feeding negativity only leaves you famished
So when I'm challenged by the odds I even out the balance
By advancing to the next level called to fix the damaged
Who am I the lonely guy that only tries to see you fly
Don't gotta die to see the sky your limit size is by your eyes
No pair of lies can paralyze the pair of eyes that seek demise
So strategize your paradigm your lonely spirit sees inside
That's why I speak to represent the weak
To represent the geeks or weirdos labeled freaks
Because those sticks and stones are usually aimed at me
But since I found my calling they are getting hard to reach
I'm still gon have my bad days and morph em into good days
I still get writer's blockade putting thoughts on one page
I still go back to young age and wishing it could replay
Cuz being people's black aide needs an R&R day
Still see demons everyday finding ways to go shake em
Some of em self conflicted these habits gotta break em
Some of em are depicted when people change than face em
But I plea them be acquitted to dismiss em and then case em

Aye Lamar that's too far don't you preach to em
If it's bars keep it dark you can reach to em
Using spark from ya smarts is a breach to em
But ya art is Rosa Parks give the seats to em