Bedlam

Hey shrink, I know it's a lil' late but
I stayed up thinkin' bout whatchu said
And to be honest you were right like
None of this shit really matters
A person only has so much energy
And it's not worth wasting
Over something I can't change
I realized I been livin' life
Thinkin' bout the next day
Not knowing what I want out of it
Kinda like I'm waiting for something you get me?
But yeah my mind's bare clear now
Preciate you for real, link up soon

Ever since ain't been okay
And you still wondering
Why the fuck I left to this day
No ballerina, just like Kanye wanna run away
Even though it hurt
Part of me really loves that day
Oh, you really thought I play
Don't hit me with a hey
Not a killer, but bitch don't test me
I could really slay
My vision could go red
And won't care bout whatchu say
Not a smart move bitch
I advise you to stay away

Listen, I don't speak though
Cause' everyone's a fuckin snake
Teach em', no one see bro
Told em' don't be on display
Cause you could think they real
But all along you been the prey
Fucked me up for the better
Cause there's not a day where I ain't prayed

Finally understood those words
Most the world are bitch-made
Deep inside they know they fucked up
Still blame you like you betrayed
Could have acted differently
But God taught me this way
And all of the sudden they get jealous
When the fit ones kiss ray
Like, "even though it's his day, fuck it, snake him this May"
And he gon let it slide
Or maybe do me like I'm Dris, aye
If you know me by now, no can't I live this way
The app say it's sunny
For some reason I still see grey
Like no I ain't okay
Before wanted to kill my haters
Find a way to make em' pay
Like when I see em'
It's on sight end em' straight away
Now it's thanks you kept me laughing
The slightest thought makes my day

Nah, I don't vent to people
Just the sky and 808s
Half the time you see me
I'm gazed off or on a breakaway
Like catch me in a fortnight
More than just couple days away

Try to be nice, fuck that
The new me gave that away
To who other than a mom that
Comes home from work all drained away
Feel the best in my dreams
So fuck tryna stay awake
(Like fuck tryna stay awake)

Now shawty got some confidence
She looked better wit no makeup
And when the youngin talk
Ain't gotta be about a breakup
Made his move, he took the risk
He tried to shoot instead of layup
I finally realized they'd stay dreams
If I don't wake up, nah

But bitch I been awake
Cause' all that shit was past tense
Been unavailable, my fault you ain't got no access
In my head all day
Starin' at the ceiling on my mattress
I built a fuckin kingdom
Out of clay like I'm Cassius

It's like music is my therapy
These days it's the only thing that's helpin' me
Love my haters need a laugh once and I while
So yeah I listen to what they tellin' me
Seeing one of my kind fail
Is the only thing that's been melting me
A helping hand, maybe that's
What I'm set out to be
I fuckin' love it when I know a person doubting me
My sign is Taurus
But I fuck wit every starlight
The sadness was back then
These days I been alright