Better Now

Every day is just another day
Feels like my problems never go away
I just left the mountains, had to get away
See that's my problem, I vacation then I hide away again
I don't ever help myself no

I was having thoughts of wishing I didn't wake up again
Crazy how the people that I loved the most weren't checking in
I didn't know what I did, but it's my fault
Somehow, tired of being everybody's let down

I'm the only one
I'm the only that feels this way, I'm sure
Everybody else is probably straight, I'm sure
Everybody's doing fine, but me
Fine but me

Feels like I'm stuck up in my head, feeling dead
All I see is red
Been here for a while, did the mile
Still stuck in the end

Stuck up in my mind all the time
I wish I could die
Been here for a minute, I admit it
Most of the blame is mine

Feels like I'm stuck up in my head, feeling dead
All I see is red
Been here for a while, did the mile
Still stuck in the end

Stuck up in my mind all the time
I wish I could die
Been here for a minute, I admit it
Most of the blame is mine

Somehow it's my fault, all of the blame's on me
God, I pray that soon you plan on taking me
'Cause I'm the only one that's tired of failing me
Everybody else will just fail me again and again

I got my car, and I went on long drives for my therapy
Then I went applied for therapy, it's helping me
I'm feeling better now
All those thoughts I used to have slowly started getting out
Finally, started speaking out

Funny how that works
I was tired of getting lonely 'cause it turned into outbursts
If you know me, then you know you never saw me at church
I was running from my Savior like He wasn't there first

Like He wasn't there for me
Through all the nights I tried to pray, but I couldn't share Him me
Through all the times I thought that God had just abandoned me
It's like sometimes I just forgot He put the air in me
Right now He's sparing me

I hope He's proud of me
I hope He sees me trying to be what I was made to be
Yeah, I was locked inside a cell, but He just made a key
Feels like this ever-changing game was really made for me
I think it's made for me, I know it's made for me