Holy Smokes (2021 Version)

I saw Jesus on the corner
Talking to some kids
Leaning on a light post
Rolling up a spliff
He said, "child, come and try this"
As he pointed right at me
Handed me a joint
Said this might help you believe

Oh, I thought that I knew Mary
The mother of the Babe
But the Saviour learned his lessons
From wise old Mary Jane
All those miracles he did
All those parables he told
Were inspired by the ganja that he regularly rolled

The night I smoked with Jesus, I saw heaven way up close
I saw grandma in her nighty faded with the Holy Ghost
I saw David and Goliath
And man were they both stoned
I saw all of the apostles in a cloud of righteous smoke

I said, "hey, is this what you meant by saved?
To get so high, it's spiritual
You just kinda float away"
I said, "hey, will I see you when I die?"
He said, "If you keep on puffing
Then, it all turns out alright"

I heard Jesus on the corner
Talking to some cops
Only doobie lovin' Jesus gets the law enforcement crossed
If you travel down to Venice
And you're cruisin' right along
I guarantee you'll see him
The Saviour and his bong

And on Sunday he is preachin'
A blunt's good for the soul
THC for all, for there is freedom in the bowl
If you need white-robed Jesus
He's somewhere in LA
Growin' marijuana
And burnin' 'til he's blazed

The night I smoked with Jesus, I saw heaven way up close
I saw grandma in her nighty faded with the Holy Ghost
I saw David and Goliath
And man were they both stoned
I saw all of the apostles in a cloud of righteous smoke

I said, "Hey, is this what you meant by saved?
To get so high, it's spiritual, you just kinda float away"
I said, "Hey, will I see you when I die?"
He said, "If you keep on puffing
Then, it all turns out alright"

So, I'll just keep on puffin'
Hope it all turns out alright