Awful

(Cole, you stupid)

Oh, I've been broke down for so long, I've lost count
Of the days I lost out, I couldn't be saved
The silence is so loud, it's hard for me to show how
There's some things about me that I just can't explain
Three feet, halfway, still diggin' my grave
How the fuck I'm supposed to change when I'm so used to being played
My mind stuck in a maze, I think I'm turnin' crazy
Funny part about it, I tell you this shit everyday

I admit that it's my fault and I know that's my loss
When I break down and spiral, it's from the pain that I caused
Well, I guess it's all my fault, and I guess it's all my loss
But I don't need your sorrow 'cause I know that I'm awful, yeah

I always wanna fuck up love
I always wanna fuck up love
I always wanna fuck up love
I always wanna fuck up love

I'm awful, I admit it (I admit it)
All these toxic inhibitions
It's kinda like a drug fuckin' you up, I'm so addicted
I know I'm twisted for all the times
That I was duckin' and missin' your calls
I was fuckin' on yo' best friend and breakin' her walls
Took y'all to lunch
Y'all was sharing y'all straws like you shared this dick (damn)
That's some secondhand embarrassment
You didn't even spare a second to realize I'm awful

And really sick inside, pick a time
I know I said I love you
But just like everything I tell you, it's a lie
Really got a twisted mind, I deny it every time
But I love to see you cry, wish that I could tell you why (oh)
And I mean it so sincerely (oh)
Losing you has never feared me (oh)
But at least, at least

I admit that it's my fault and I know that's my loss
When I break down and spiral, it's from the pain that I caused
Well, I guess it's all my fault, and I guess it's all my loss
But I don't need your sorrow 'cause I know that I'm awful, yeah

I always wanna fuck up love
I always wanna fuck up love
I always wanna fuck up love
I always wanna fuck up love

Me and trust don't get along, we too far gone, we parted ways
I'm an old dirty bastard, shimmy ya, shimmy yay
Gettin' ready for my casket and your heart is where I lay
I'm done speaking on the past tense 'cause our future is erased
Only stuck 'round for pleasure, I confess, you know I'm awful
Haven't learned from your lessons
Wonderin' what your mama taught you, 'cause it clearly ain't enough
Do you hear me through my lust
I know pain is like a drug, it's interfering with the spirits up above
The feelings for my love, but I told you, I know

I admit that it's my fault and I know that's my loss
When I break down and spiral, it's from the pain that I caused
Well, I guess it's all my fault, and I guess it's all my loss
But I don't need your sorrow 'cause I know that I'm awful, yeah

I always wanna fuck up love
I always wanna fuck up love
I always wanna fuck up love
I always wanna fuck up love

(Cole, you stupid)