Painful

All my life I felt like no one cared
They didn't listen
I remember searching through the kitchen
Finding a knife and I started slitting
My wrist and
The bloods dripping
The thoughts flowing
The false moments
That made me feel like I wasn't worth half a cent
My minds a prison
And I will never let you in it
No matter how many times that you tried convincing
You'll never get it
I feel like quitting
I needed you most when you turned your back i won't forget it

I survived
I don't know how
But imagine waking up in a hospital with the sound
Of not breathing
I'm not dreaming
And my demons
Surround my bed while I'm screaming
On the inside cause I can't even attempt to make a voice
Tryna find God but he's lost inside the void of this
Mock devil
Who starts trouble
He wants to bury me alive I saw em grab the shovel
It's painful

Life is hard I know cutting is tempting
Cause it's the only thing relieving you from the pain you're experiencing
But I promise that life will get better
Put down the razorblades and write yourself a letter
To your younger self
Before all the trauma
Before all the pain
Before the heartbreak
Before the trauma
Before the pain
Before the heartbreak
My heart aches