Bliss Joined to the Bane

Blinding light brazenly burns a hole through my eyelids
Forcing me to wake up and undergo the pain I created
My organs feel like they're covered in chewed gum
Sticking to each other, my flesh and my bones
The inside of my head feels like I need to scratch it
Nagging ice pick headaches spike my skull 'till my brain splits
My body and sense of self won't be getting along
Until I get some hair of the dog

What to do?
Dull and alone
Fear-ridden, worry-prone
Lost and empty
Vaguely self-destructive

Symptom of discretion
Put off counting the damage
With immersion in regression
Bliss joined to the bane

I'm a fat fucking mess and i'm dirty as shit
That'll be old news when I get a drink
I'll be the most charming man in the universe, just watch
How everybody is laughing when I talk
You precious thing
Numb the dread
Go out and play
Come home when you're dead

What to do?
Sick and unclean
Oily hair and yellow teeth
Tired and aching
But still returning

I can't begin to measure
The harm done by the pleasure
Of my immersion in regression
Buried with the bane