8 Cigarettes

Poppin' pills from some time
Just to heal me and hide my crime
That I broke your heart baby but
Who the fuck cares about mine
Crowded areas feel deserted
Broken heart and emotions hurted
Freedom feels like a prison
Or maybe it's my blurred vision

I've seen all people unfolding lives in miraculous ways
While I'm figuring out still who leaves and who stays
Tired of these fake smiles and frequent break down nights
Only cigarette and red eyes can make me now feel alright

I am walking, falling and hurting since week one
I've passed a few strangers but I got attention none
I am so tired of these mother fuckers around me
It's been eight years since I felt lil glee

I got so high that my eyes now barely blink
Smoke everywhere and I don't even think
Call it a hell or you can call it my home, but
Demons have been following me every where I roam

I know that I messed shit
But I am a stressed shit
I know that it's no reason
Sadness is what I'm obsessed with

I took 8 cigarettes cause I did not wanna feel tonight
I got drowned in smoke solely to feel alright
I kept raising smoke until I couldn't self recognise
And I stayed in the mind set until came eventide

I could hardly know who I am where the fuck have I been
Suffered heart breaks ever since I was a little teen
I have seen a lot that slowly fucked up all my feels
Everything was in my head and it became a big deal

Sleepless nights and days are void
Beautiful things are now destroyed
It turned me up a paranoi
I was and I'm still annoyed
Smile's a joke happiness devoid
I see people tryna me avoid
Closest ones are who break the most
Trust from my life is unemployed

They said they'd be by my side, they lie
All I could see is nothing but a black sky
Next thing that I know was I got so high
This is how I kissed teenage good-bye