Still My Angel..

Grandma
I pray to God you still hearing this
It's been hell without you
Tears while I'm reading this
The words I'm finna speak
The tears that's finna scream
My wrists start to bleed
Wishing it was me
Up on that stage when my heart distorted
I sense fright within my mother's voice
This is your performance
Pops said you was critical
You loved me unconditional
Life was hell
Pure terror for you
Why's it being stripped from you
The fact you gave us everything
There's nothing that you didnt
I'm talking to an angel now
I'm proud to say you've risen
I'm humbled to have been raised by you
Still flowing
Ocean
Bayou
Mom's the only woman like you
Rest now
I'll sleep beside you
You fed me when my stomach didn't have a plate
Took me for rides all them summer days
Cuddles when the storm came
All those headaches from my homework every day
I'm not trying to do life without you Ma you've got to stay
Meet my kids one day
See me get married
Build a house some day
For you to prosper
No more somber
Take your pain away
I've hated seeing you couped up
Wired up
Sealed shut
All the scars you had across your chest
Heart
Stitched up
You was home just days ago
That alone tears my soul apart
This ain't the life I wanted for you
Machines breathing for you
A stroke that destroyed your brain
My heart doesn't beat the same
You sacrificed all you've ever had for us
Wish I did the same
I wish that I had called
For you to see me perform
Told me I'm your favorite artist
CD held in your palms
Me wrapped in your arms
I can't believe your gone
Somebody tell me this ain't real
Twenty years I'm finna spill
I'd trade life to live those summer nights
All the little trips we had
Snacks watching TV
You was always teasing me
All the shopping that you did for me
Nights said you was praying for me
Wishing for the best for me
Held on to the fact you loved me
I'm lonely
My heart big but you gave me yours
Because mine tore
Shattered memories to the floor
That's all I have of you
Can't grab the thought of you being taken away from me
Love you
Signed
The family

Because you made us that
Death challenged you so you fought back
Took a dub from that
Heavens what you gained back
No more suffering
This verse is about to puncture me
Life is such a privilege
But your love was a luxury
None of us deserved it
What'd we do to earn it
What you endured was temporary
Perfections always permanent
That's what you are now
No
That's something you've always been
And just because the temples crumbled
Doesn't mean this has to end
And I won't let it