complex

I'm 21, the edge is razor-thin
Between being numb and feeling everything
Good days only serve as relief again

Now I'm watching as I waste away my days and then
It's a cross dissolve, it's a scene I've played before
And the leading role that I thought I'd hold
Doesn't listen to me anymore

But I'm wearing his boxers, I'm being a good wife
We won't be together, but maybe the next life
I need him like water, he lives on a landslide
I cry in his bathroom, he turns off the big light

I'm being the cool girl, I'm keeping it so tight
I carry him home while my friends have a good night
I need him like water, he thinks that I'm alright
I'm not feeling human, I think he's a good guy

But it is complex, it's a complex

Triangular, I can see them now
Three points at which I let myself down
I was just a girl, what's the excuse now?

Too regular, this pattern I've
Been taking shelter in, reaching new highs
When I was 19, I wanted to die

Now I just wanna kill you, but I don't wanna paint you the victim
And I talk a good game, I'd die for just the promise you'd listen

But I'm wearing his boxers, I'm being a good wife
We won't be together, but maybe the next life
I need him like water, he lives on a landslide
I cry in his bathroom, he turns off the big light

I'm being the cool girl, I'm keeping it so tight
I carry him home while my friends have a good night
I need him like water, he thinks that I'm alright
I'm not feeling human, I think he's a good guy

But it's complex, it's a complex

It's a complex, I'm a complex