You're Short (Bonus Version)

There's a tale of a man who got swindled by a town
So he led all the kids in the river to drown
And I'm afraid that I face a similar fate
Cause this Piper really makes me wanna jump in a lake
She's a mistake
So a diss track I have to make
And it's so mean to Piper you can just call it Jake
And speaking of the man, the myth, the god
There's nothing else to say just wanna give him a nod
He's a beast
She's deceased
Or she will be when she falls off those stilts on her feet
Platforms the height of Max Vause times two
So I don't think they can legally be called shoes

You're short
You're short

Y'all remember who Piper played in the play?
It was Benedict
There's nothing else I gotta say
Piper was the perfect fit for the role
Because she's been a dick ever since she was born
Something else fits Benedict was a bachelor
It seems that Pipers following after
Because just like her characters wishes
It's almost like Pipers trying not to get bitches
Ayo Chuck, you got something you wanna say?
Well she's a woman, that's bad
And she's gay, that's worse
Yeah I always put straight people first
And I'm gonna put Piper in a hearse
Cause I'm the rad republican make America great again
Saluting Uncle Ben met my wife when she was ten

You're short
You're short

Piper you suck at Mario Kart
Probably because you are a fucking tart
You ain't ever fucking ready when the race about to start
And you ain't got no motherfuckin drift game fool
Yeah you probably play king boo
And you get so mad when I run and race circles round you
So now ima ask you "whatchu gon do?"
When you need a step ladder just to fuckin tie my shoes
Short short you're short
Short short you're short
Short short you're short
Short yeah and you ain't got no retort now