Scars

You talk about issues?
I guess I got a few
You really wanna listen?
Okay, gimme a minute or two
You know about anxiety?
'Cause I sure do
Or should we start with abandonment?
That's a good one, too
You're getting close to someone
Finally start to open up
But you're scared everyday and
All you really wanna do is shut
The door you opened to 'em
Get away before they hurt you
If you're already alone
Then there's nobody to desert you
Now logically you know
That this person isn't the last one
And you know that what you're feeling
Is just trauma from a past love
But you can't shake the feeling
That they will do you the same
And you'll have to live through the losses over again
So at the first sign of struggle
Fight or flight just starts to kick in
It hits you in your chest
Feels like your heart just really caves in
The adrenaline starts to pump
The sweat's already drippin'
You feel it in the pit of your stomach
That feeling is so sickening
How can you have a relationship
When you can't trust another being?
How can you start a family
With somebody that ain't seeing
The fact that they will leave you
When they see this side of you
If you don't flee first, that is
And then that is on you

Oooh
The scars I bear in my mind
Oooh
Makes it hard to survive

Wait, what was that first one?
Oh yeah, I remember now
Anxiety, your closest friend
He's been with you forever now
You grow up with one another
You two even share a room now
And guess who is the bigger spoon?
It sure as shit ain't you now
See, you can have a perfect day
Where everything is going great
And then just like that
Everything just starts to disintegrate
For no apparent reason
But the heartbeat's in your ears
And the room starts to spin
And all you're hearing is your fears
They're laughing at you loudly
And look, here come the tears
You're gonna have a black out again?
Maybe down a couple beers?
But you know that it don't help, right?
Drinking makes it worse
Even though you feel like it's impossible that it can hurt
It can't get any worse, right?
Well, I saved the best one for last
I think he's coming up the driveway
He's always going fast
But yeah, he's pulling up now
Let me get the door
And show you the only thing
That we both fear even more

Oooh
The scars I bear in my mind
Oooh
Makes it hard to survive

Let me introduce you
This here is depression
He's just a result
Of every feeling you're suppressin'
Everything you lock inside?
This guy make sure it stays in
So he can feed from everything
Every feeling that you bring
He sits there and takes his time
And when it's right he stops by
And when he's here you'll know it
There's not a second then that goes by
Without his intervention
He'll bleed you 'till you feel dry
Sometimes even literally
You know them scars you try to hide?
It may have been your hand
That held the razor or the sharp knife
But he's the one laughing from the back
In the shadows behind
He's the ugly face you see
In the mirror every time
And he's the voice inside your mind
That feeds you all the lies
That makes you feel so worthless
All the nights where you just cried
And every sunny morning
Where you wished that you just died
Peacefully in your sleep
He's the one behind it all
He's not your best friend
He's the reason that you always fall
I know he keeps a tight grip
But trust me, that's not love
He's a culmination of everything I said above
Abandonment, anxiety, doubt
And so much more
He is everything combined
That beat you down unto the floor
Look at you, laying there
Sobbing uncontrollably
When all these dark feelings
Are robbing you emotionally
I'm sorry that you have to
Go through this all on your own
But then again, with these guys with you
You'll never be alone

Oooh
The scars I bear makes it hard
Oooh
Makes it hard to survive