I Wonder (feat. Role)

Sometimes I wonder if a god really exist
I ain't mean no disrespect, god its just the way it is
And its just the way I think, I ain't got no one to blame
But I got so many questions, like why must we suffer pain
While a mom buries her child, another throws hers away
While a child loses their father, the farther the mother strays
From a bond that's built to last
While someone seeks education
Another gonna kill their class
Some brothers and sisters pass
Its tragic
I'm wondering, asking why you would ever let his happen
Why the wars and all the genocides
Got me questioning heaven, I'm sorry if I've strayed away
From praying to you everyday
Its not that I don't want to, my mind just been in a different space
I swear its been preoccupied
I'm crawling through the valley of the shadow of death while others walking by
Why do we ostracize, outcast, oppress one another
Some shit just doesn't make sense, cause when a bullet hits the flesh
Our bodies bleed the same color
So hatred comes from the mind
The mind you gave us to use
The mind that makes us confused
The mind that suffers abuse
The mind that shapes all our views
The mind that bends and breaks
And ends up taking out a life or two
Its tragic
I'm wondering asking why you would ever let this happen
I'm stuck in a loop and I need some answers
Why does ignorance equate to bliss, the opposite sadness
Live a life just to be buried or carried around as ashes

I'm just trying to find my way, lately I been buried up in so much pain
I'm just trying to find my way, crazy when I question everything
I'm just trying to find my way, wonder if I might see change
I'm just trying to find my way, wonder if its ever too late

I just don't get it
I'm not afraid to admit it
You often punish the innocent, others revel in sinning
Please forgive me for I question everything to the root
I've been clinging to my faith, need you to show me the truth
Cause in a world of greed and power
All we want is the loot
And never mind the means to get it
Desperate times will make a decent man make indecent decisions
Its the nature of humanity
A never ending war taking never ending casualties
I wish that I could say I know I'm destined to heaven
A mess in the head been just wondering and pondering on several questions
Its raining and thundering
Wonder if there's any honor in protecting my blessings
I know that life is a bitch, a bitch that like to get hectic
God, I swear mean no wrong but still I write you this message
Cause I been seeking some answers
And I ain't seeing no pastor nor am I preaching to masses
I've just been reaching for balance, yeah
The world crushing my shoulders, my hands are completely callused
Its tragic
I'm wondering asking why you would ever let this happen
But I've come to understand that you've given us full control
Free will, and there's a reason
I can feel it in my soul
What I ask of you is not a miracle
But patience, it takes a lot
Just show me the way and I
Will make it straight to the top
And don't lock me out for all my doubt
Through ups and downs
I hope you save a spot, Nueve

I'm just trying to find my way, lately I been buried up in so much pain
I'm just trying to find my way, crazy when I question everything
I'm just trying to find my way, wonder if I might see change
I'm just trying to find my way, wonder if its ever too late

I'm just trying to find my way, lately I been buried up in so much pain
I'm just trying to find my way, crazy when I question everything
I'm just trying to find my way, wonder if I might see change
I'm just trying to find my way, wonder if its ever too late