Hiraeth (Couldn't Handle The Tears)

I used to believe in the stars
With the others cause I'm scared
That they would do
The things you did to me

Uh
My life is bitter sweet
I'm taking mine as a grant, I'll go and kiss my teeth
I used to run the streets... never feed the beef
I got the sauce but I relish for that sweet release

I want the sweet relief, want a sweeter smile
Want a sweetener by my side, that may take a while
Smellin' nice, feelin' sharp, I could cut a tile
Lookin' for my Tessa tell that girl she got a killer smile

I'm used to holding back
Keep my cool, keep my calm, keep it chill and that
You'll hear the change in my voice when I feel attacked
My life is heavy, when I'm fine I'll put it in a rap

And I'll be full of all this doubt
Never like it on my ones, I'll keep my demons around
I tell em, this is for my family, I'm keepin' em proud
It's the power of now you know the sweeter the sound
I used to believe in the stars
With the others cause I'm scared
That they would do
The things you did to me

I used to believe in the stars
With the others cause I'm scared
That they would do
The things you did to me

Yo
These are, words of a broken man, workin' a hopeless plan
Hopin' the plan will work, watching the candle burn
The hour hand turns, when will We have our turn?
I wish you had a heart, ugh

You couldn't handle the tears
How dare you ever chat to me about a rapping career
I was man of the year before even had a career
Now I'm wondering what the actual fuck is happening here

I stop and I blink, this music game is not what you think
I was popping off back when popping off just wasn't a thing
Fucked all the baddies you can name and they just wanted a ring
But I was married to the game you just forgotten the king, forgot my limit

All my brothers been to prison cos there fucking schizophrenic
I was cool with skipping school but I could never skip a visit
Coke made my brother kill himself I'll never sniff a ticket
As a kid I used to hide the heroine up in the kitchen

When the police would raid the crib there be no evidence I bin it
Didn't have no innocent so in a sense I was complicit
Still the only time I ever see the pen was in my lyrics listen

I used to believe in the stars
With the others cause I'm scared
That they would do
The things you did to me

Uh
Give me something to believe in
To live and not receive it
Layin' wide awake cause I sleep when I'm dreaming
He became a demon, she became a heathen

A lost voice takes flight in the thick of things
Take a lie, fake smile, in the thickest shit
Never married to my life put a ring on it
Now I'm ringing here, just ringing on my ringers list

Cause I'm a lost voice livin' in the dark
Runnin' for the hills and bleeding there for the scars, it's hard
Take a beat and try and make it my advance
It's the essence to my life so I can leave it in the past

Cause were all fucking demons
And were all fucking heathens
Yeah were all fucking heathens
I'll take your hand if you're ready to believe it

I can't escape, you cant relate
You feel my pain, you hear the rage inside this cage
And now I'm looking at the stars
Cause I'll never feel the same