A Televangelist Stole My Virginity
I just fucking kissed daddy televangelist
And he fed me lies from the breast of God
Blindfolded taste, so I lapped it up in haste
And he laughed and cheered as I willingly died
Fought the prophet's war but you started getting bored
So you bent your knee to a foxhole god
Tried to find your place but you gotta win the race
Your trumpet wilts and your song's denied (and you're crucified)
Oh, Mother Mary, can you help me?
Can you help me?
Oh, Mother Mary, can you help me?
Can you help me?
Because a fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
Yes, a fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
The stars in the sky, they just poked me in the eye
There's a man up there looking down at me
He said, "Jesus is the way" so I trusted him okay
Though he bore a pitchfork and goatee
I saw him again at the funeral of my friend
On the TV screen, burning gasoline
He said, "If you want to live, then you gotta learn to give!"
Well I do love God, I guess I'll give a bit (yeah, that handled it)
Oh, Mother Mary, can you help me?
Can you help me?
Oh, Mother Mary, can you help me?
Can you help me?
Because a fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
Yes, a fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
You're going to hell!
You're going to hell!
You're going to hell!
You're going to hell!
Providence is out of season (You're going to hell!)
"Death to all of those who reason" (You're going to hell!)
Buy your yachts, your cars and planes (You're going to hell!)
And fuck us all for mortal gain (You're going to hell!)
The only way out is through!
Oh, Mother Mary, can you help me?
Can you help me?
Oh, Mother Mary, can you help me?
Can you help me?
Because a fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
Yes, a fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
Yes, a fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
A fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
And he fed me lies from the breast of God
Blindfolded taste, so I lapped it up in haste
And he laughed and cheered as I willingly died
Fought the prophet's war but you started getting bored
So you bent your knee to a foxhole god
Tried to find your place but you gotta win the race
Your trumpet wilts and your song's denied (and you're crucified)
Oh, Mother Mary, can you help me?
Can you help me?
Oh, Mother Mary, can you help me?
Can you help me?
Because a fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
Yes, a fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
The stars in the sky, they just poked me in the eye
There's a man up there looking down at me
He said, "Jesus is the way" so I trusted him okay
Though he bore a pitchfork and goatee
I saw him again at the funeral of my friend
On the TV screen, burning gasoline
He said, "If you want to live, then you gotta learn to give!"
Well I do love God, I guess I'll give a bit (yeah, that handled it)
Oh, Mother Mary, can you help me?
Can you help me?
Oh, Mother Mary, can you help me?
Can you help me?
Because a fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
Yes, a fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
You're going to hell!
You're going to hell!
You're going to hell!
You're going to hell!
Providence is out of season (You're going to hell!)
"Death to all of those who reason" (You're going to hell!)
Buy your yachts, your cars and planes (You're going to hell!)
And fuck us all for mortal gain (You're going to hell!)
The only way out is through!
Oh, Mother Mary, can you help me?
Can you help me?
Oh, Mother Mary, can you help me?
Can you help me?
Because a fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
Yes, a fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
Yes, a fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
A fucking televangelist is fucking up my face
And he's telling me the rules but I don't even know his name
Credits
Writer(s): Brandon Abiuso
Lyrics powered by www.musixmatch.com
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