I Stand Corrected

Yeah

Let's try this

The goal is growth
Admittedly my pride won't let me concede without a fight
It's only cause I know the ropes
Naturally I'm comfy with my back against them
Blow for blow
To have you winning
Only makes me hungrier to close the show
Not that I come with bad intentions
But I own it though
I'm no longer apprehensive
Tryna control The Hulk
Being this vulnerable
For better or worse
Is why judgment will not affect me if we ever converse
I get the why it's
It's just the way we're living
It's a given
It's why I grew up refusing to step in the church
Would criticize it
For all the committed inside it
Criticizing
Not only was I a hypocrite I accepted the perks
Gladly
Anytime a blessing would work
Was switching sides and
The minute I'd get
Pressed with a verse
Would get defiant
Especially if the lesson would hurt
Couldn't admit it
I instead would rather question its worth
Took some time to sit in private
Came to the realization
I'm taking
The most blatant
Examples
Of negativity and
Calling it justification
For my hatred
All cause I couldn't deal with my spirit aching
I stand corrected

Yeah

Music's always been my therapy
Never thought I actually needed it
Told them it's just passion I'm speaking with
When my anger got the best of me
I'd effectively
Invalidate my argument just cause I had to be screaming it
Lord
I'm a bully
Riddled with guilt it's hard
Not to inflict
When I'M struggling with how to deal with scars
All these wounds
The pain I'm in
No matter the light that I try to paint it in
Soon as I send the payment in
I'm seen
The beautiful wedding that has an asterisk due to the few who ain't attend
The fact that soon as I leave a session Expressing
Myself immediately goes back to not feeling safe again
So I gotta be brave but then
Nobody ever taught me how
And so I break again
Cause even when I'm staying in
I gotta wake up in
Despair
They took out Takeoff and I don't know how to take it in
Cause I feel like it's wrong for me to care
For a lot of reasons
Another 14 were shot in the same day in the
Chi in a drive-by and I barely stopped to grieve them
Just for example
What that say about me
That I'm easily distracted
Selectively impacted
Not actually saddened
Only acting
Maybe there's some compassion
But maybe I'm only half in
Maybe I'm just tired of having
To see it happen
And by the time it's reported
I've aborted
Speaking of
Nah we'll save it
For another conversation
There's so much to say and
There ain't enough time
I wonder how my therapist gone weigh in
That's new
I guess I'm really changing
I stand corrected