Poor Unfortunate Souls

I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well
A witch
But you'll find that nowadays
I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light and made a switch
True? Yes

And I fortunately know a little magic
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh
I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, lonely and depressed
Pathetic

Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
And do I help them?
Yes, indeed

Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my cauldron
Crying, "Spells, Ursula, please!"
And I help 'em?
Yes, I do

Now it's happened once or twice
Someone couldn't pay the price
And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em 'cross the coals
Yes, I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls, ah

(So here's the deal)
(I'll whip up a little potion to make you human for three days)
(Got that? Three days)
(Before the sun sets on the third day, you and princey must share a kiss)
(And not just any kiss: the kiss of true love)
(If you do, you will remain human permanently)
(But if you don't, you'll turn back into a mermaid, and you belong to me)
(We got a deal?)

(I don't know)
(Life's full of tough choices, in'it?)
(No, this is wrong. I can't do this)
(Fine then, forget about the world above)
(Go back home to daddy and never leave again)

Come on
You poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead!
Make your choice
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much
Just your voice

You poor unfortunate soul
It's sad, but true
If you want to cross the bridge, my sweet, you've got to pay the toll
Pluck a scale from off your tail
A drop of blood inside the bowl!
Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her, boys
The boss is on a roll!
This poor unfortunate soul!

Beluga! Sevruga! Come, winds of the Caspian Sea!
Amnesia, glossitis et max laryngitis, la voce to me!
Now sing!

Keep singing!