Last Shall Be First

Yeah
It's been a long time coming
You know, I was out in the wilderness for a while
But now I'm crossing over
(S^LT)

I've been patiently waitin, was never forsaken
Had to get myself up out the gutter
If I was goin make it, been patiently waitin
Father, you was just holding me close
Didn't really know that I was made in ya image
Until the vision that struck me
It really shook me, rocked me
It really took me to the realm of the spirit
Had to lean close in to hear ya
Never knew your voice was so clear
Had to really trust you
Had to stand firm on ya word
Through all the pain and all the hurt
Through the lying, the crying
Betrayal and deceit
Ain't gon' put it all on them
It ain't gon' put it all on me
I know the devil be the reason
Lost some friends in my last season
If I'm really gon' be truthful
Ain't no way it was gon' be fruitful
But that's enough of that
Blessings on blessings to you
I hope you reap everything that you sown
And find real love too
I mean that in the mighty name of Jesus Christ
For real

You know it's hard to let some things
And some people go but
Trust me, God's got a blessing for you and them
He's got a plan
Just trust him

But back to it, I was so passive in my voice
I never stood on the things that I felt
Causing myself and the ones around me
To go through hell, it was insane
It was insanity
Showed I never cared for me
Showed I never understood who I was
Through the calamity
But y'all knew that
Y'all hurt me, y'all abused that
I'm healing, I'm gon' make it through
I know he'll do the same for you
The hurt is true, it's very real
I know I played a part in that
I hope you can forgive me
Through my choices and my trauma acts

The first shall be last
And last shall be first
Oh

The life I was living
I took it to the limit
Satan's playground
A one-way ticket
Selling drugs and violence
Is what I was living
A whole lot of cash
You couldn't tell me different
Thinking I had it all
I was so ignorant
I was resentful, envious, and belligerent
Pride so high
I was feeling it
No one could stop me
I was a misfit
Caught up in the world
Rebellion got a hold of me
Caught a case and ended up taking a plea
Had to humble myself
Got down on my knees
Praying, asking God to forgive me
Little did I know the plans He had for me
Cause living in this world
Ain't gonna do nothing for me
The first shall be last
Man, that ain't me
The last shall be first
Thank you, Lord, for humbling me

Sis how you gon' tell him bout the way that you found God
Bout how you left your old life
How you went left then went right
So many times I saw the worst in me
Main one that was hurtin me
I know you can relate to being the one dead in your faith

In a dark place at my lowest, empty
Jesus came and grabbed me and lifted me
Much joy, old life didn't exist to me
Tired of the back and forth
Hated the old me
Worst in me, girl
Mirror had a hold of me
Reality inside, hurting deeply
Faith gone, no mustard seed in me
Sis how you keep your faith swallowed by the sea

When I was traumatized at 10
I didn't see the light
All I had was many tears
Fears and no fight, I didn't understand my life
But I knew there was a God
He had to love me right
He had to hear my heart cry
My heart crying out for God
Soft sobs, love robbed
But I knew that he was gon' meet me where I was
I stood my ground
And I stood on faith
Didn't really make sense then
But now I'm living in greatness
So far it's been straight bliss
Been being in his shadow
Was hidden from the world
But now he letting me at 'em
I'm gon' expose the devil for what he is
And that's the truth I
Was living in last place
But now I'm out front

I just wanna speak to whoever's listening to this track right now
It says in Matthew 19, vs 29 and 30
It says, for anyone who has left behind their home and property
Leaving family, brothers and sisters
Mothers and fathers or children
For my sake
They will be repaid a hundred times over
And will inherit eternal life
In verse 30 it says, but many who push themselves to be first
Will find themselves last
And those who are willing to be last
Will find themselves to be first
I'm telling you right now
If you feel like you just been doing everything
You done gave up everything
And it doesn't make sense to you why
It seems like everybody is being pushed to the front and you not
This verse makes it very clear
You been doing this because he's building your character
He's doing things inside of you
And He's working inside of you
And He's doing things behind the scene
So that way He can get his glory
He'll make you first
Because he knows that you'll give him his glory