Birthday Blues

Wrote myself a birthday card
The one where it's your birthday
It was FRIENDS themed
My comfort show and much more
Wrote it one week prior to the 24th
May my words blur in my mind
It could count as a surprise

So much mental preparation
I told myself I wanted to spend it alone
But the truth is I was afraid no one would show up

I get even more sentimental on this day
I do everything to avoid those birthday blues
No self-pep talk can fill that void
And save me from feeling those birthday blues

I wanna pretend I'm one
Of those people that don't care for it
I'm one year older what's the big deal?
But when I blow those candles
I wish to be loved and celebrated I do I do

So much mental preparation
I told myself I wanted to spend it alone
But the truth is I was afraid no one would show up

I get even more sentimental on this day
I do everything to avoid those birthday blues
No self-pep talk can fill that void
And save me from feeling those birthday blues

I push away push away
I delude myself into thinking the choice is mine
See I need space
I need alone time
I don't need anyone
Not even on this day
Not even on my birthday

The lines are blurred have you forgotten me
Have I run away in the nick of time?
Or are you hoping that you could be here with me?
You didn't call my bluff
M' I the reason I'm alone?

I get even more sentimental on this day
I do everything to avoid those birthday blues
No self-pep talk can fill that void
And save me from feeling those birthday blues